


'Till the end of the ride

by SmexyWatermelon



Series: Mad Like Us [1]
Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Chris has cats, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Mike is a slut, Mild Gore, accept it, chris is an adorable powerpuff with glasses, lots of depression, me being generally pissed about Josh's endings, the stranger is still a grumpy old man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-07-16 10:01:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 31,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7263466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmexyWatermelon/pseuds/SmexyWatermelon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You loved Josh from the bottom of your heart: that's the only reason that made you return to Mt. Washington and face its ghosts one more time. You hope to be able to mend broken relationships, but soon things get out of hand and you get caught in your own nightmares.</p><p>Basically if a mentally unstable and mouthy Josh girlfriend was inside the game.<br/>---<br/>Rated T for later chapters, lots of suicidal tendencies mentioned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Back up here

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually thought to be written with an OC, but I love reading the readerxperson so here it is. So, first off: 1)this is my very first fanfic. It may suck but I wanted to try. 2)English is not my first language, so I may talk weird ‘cause I learnt to speak from videogames. As always, blame the game not the gamer! 3)I may get a bit too ooc at times. If that happens, just gimme a holler and I’ll fix it. Or, well, try to.  
> enjoy~

20:46 – Eleven hours until dawn

The cable car was slowing making its way towards the top of the mountain: you exhale deeply as you feel the wind hitting the metallic surface, making the vehicle swing slowly; your stomach quickly gave you the feeling of shrinking, though you didn’t know if it was caused by being suspended hundreds of feet from the ground or the simpler fact of being back on the damn Mount Washington. You didn’t want to come back, and every fiber of your being screamed at yourself to stay the hell out of that place, but you needed to be here. For Josh’s sake, you kept telling yourself.  
It had been two weeks since you had last seen each other, and you didn’t know what to expect from him: since last year, with his sisters’ deaths, he had kept everyone distant. At the time you had told yourself he just needed to deal with his grief, that giving him space was the right thing to do.

That’s when he had tried to slit his throat open with a kitchen knife.

Since then his parents had asked you to keep an eye on him, since they couldn’t nor didn’t have the time to stalk their son around. Besides, Josh seemed to like your company more than everyone else’s, though you didn’t really know the reason; sure, you were his girlfriend, you hadn’t really participated in the prank, but you hadn’t done anything to actively stop it either. Thing that still kept you awake at night. That made you wake up in the middle of your dreams sweating, wishing you could stop having nightmares about the twins.  
You find yourself biting your lower lip while thinking back at that night – maybe you could have prevented it. Maybe if you had done something more, none of this would have fallen upon Josh.  
You tilt your head back, hitting the metal wall: you hated the situation, and knew how hard it was for Josh to deal with all of this better than anyone else, since you had suffered from depression as long as you could remember. That’s how you two met, you recall.  
You fiddled with your phone, remembering what he said in the video: “I want to spend some quality time with each and every one of you.”

“I hope that’s true, Josh.” You tell yourself, feeling your chest heavier with all these thoughts oppressing you.

You spent the rest of the trip looking out of the window, trying to see beyond the snow storm, though the beautiful mountains barely appeared as blurry grayish objects on the background.  
The cable car finally halted and you exited safely in the station, rubbing your hands together to warm them.  
You just wanted to get to the lodge, jump out of your boots and spend some of that ‘quality time’ with Josh, preferably nearby the fireplace, with lots of alcohol… and without clothes.  
You mentally silence yourself; but damn, it had been so long! You know there would have been the others, so intimacy would have been a very relative concept in a house stuffed with other seven people, but you still hoped Josh wouldn’t forget about you.  
That little break you had taken from each other was caused by exams, after all. College wasn’t going easy on you, while Josh had decided to take a year for himself, after all that had happened. Still, you couldn’t ignore your studies, even if they kept you away from him.  
You make your way towards the door, little puffs of your breath condensing in the chilly air: you try to turn the doorknob, but the door doesn't move.  
“Man… are you serious?!” you try again, with both hands this time, but all is useless: it is not frozen – as you first thought – it is _locked_.  
Your nimble – and by now numb – fingers immediately grip your phone into your side pocket and dial the lodge number, just to be answered by the voice mail.  
You groan, but it’s not like you have a lot of choice. “Josh, it’s me, (y/n); look, I know there are hobos around here but you just HAD to lock the goddamn door?! Come get me, I’m freezing!”  
Just before hanging up, you add “I love you, you dumbass.”

You put your phone away, trying to warm your arms by stroking them: you were wearing your warmest coat, a black and red tartan jacket with a furry hood, and yet this weather made you feel like wearing nothing at all. You waited various minutes, hoping the signal of your cellphone was strong enough to deliver your voice message, else you would have had to stay here for God-knows-how-long.  
You decide to try to find another way out: you look around the place carefully, trying to find anything that might help you; you spot a window and immediately try to open it, but you soon realize that even the window is covered in a thin layer of ice.

“Ugh, this damn weather.”

You look into your pocket and grab your trusty zippo: you had stopped smocking a long time ago, but kept the lighter since it was one of Josh’s gifts, one that he gave you even before becoming your boyfriend.  
You slowly and accurately melt the ice near the edge, and when everything looks melted enough you take a step back and open it with a kick. You cheer at the defeated window and open it as much as it can: you might just be able to get through it.  
You take your bag off your shoulders and slip it on the other side of the window – making it fall on the bench just outside. You then take a deep breath and stick your arms in the slit, opening the window as you crawl through it. You’re able to let your shoulders pass through it until you realize you got stuck at your waist, your eyes widening with realization.  
“Dammit, Josh! I don’t wanna die in this way!” you yell at no one in particular, the wind whipping your face with countless snowflakes.

You try to push yourself out of this situation, when you hear laughter coming from in front of you.  
“Had I known you wanted to play the damsel in distress, I would have come earlier.”  
You force yourself to look up, your arms barely standing your weight as you lean on the bench; and there he was, with his stupid beanie and a smug grin on his face.  
“Josh… fancy meeting here.” You say nonchalantly.  
“What were you trying to do exactly?” he mumbles while dropping the shovel he was carrying.  
“Ah, you know, I was just passing through here, and I thought ‘well, let’s make things interesting.’”  
He returns your condescending glare as he waits for you to speak. You exhale deeply through your nostrils as you lower your head, defeated. “You locked the damn door, you asshole.”  
“Nice way of addressing the only one around miles that might actually get you out of there.”  
“What can I say? I’ve got my way around people.” You reply with a smug face and all the sarcasm left in your body. He just chuckles, and then walks closer to you. He kneels in front of you, so that he’s at your eye level. “You didn’t have to put on a freak show: if you wanted more attention you could have just asked for it.” You feel his hands cupping your face, making you look up to him. You murmur his name as he closes the distance between you and your lips meet his.  
His kiss was soft and sweet, though needy in some kind of way. He pulls back too quickly for your tastes, but when you look at him he’s smiling again at you. “I missed you, (y/n).” Forgetting for a moment about your situation, you reciprocate the smile. “I missed you too.”  
He glares at you for a moment before standing up and clapping his hands together. “So, let’s try to pull you out of there.” You groan and look at your waist, unsure of what to do. You feel him grabbing your shoulders but you immediately snap your head up – almost hitting him – and murmur “I appreciate you being so positive about my slimness, but I don’t think I can fit through this thing.”

“Oh.” He draws back his arms. “Then.. I might be able to pull you back from the other side?” you think about it for a second, tilting slightly your head, then nod “I don’t think we have a lot of choices here.” He gives you a little reassuring smile and walks out of your view. You hear him unlock the door via the little button you knew was there from your previous visits and then you feel his steps vibrate on the floor just behind you.  
“I missed this view.” He says tapping your buttocks. You unconsciously bite your lip, then smirk at his comment “Get me out of this thing and I’ll be more than glad to let you stare at it for the rest of the night.” You can almost feel him grinning at your remark. You feel his hands roam your thighs, the rough fabric of your jeans intensifying the sensation. “I’m no game if I can just stare…” he pulls you towards him, brushing against you. You feel heat raising to your cheeks and take your lips in between your teeth, forcing you not to give him the satisfaction of hearing you moan. “M-maybe we could work something out.” You manage to stutter, hearing him chuckle lightly behind you.  
“Fair enough.” He distances from yourself and grabs your hips just at the hem of your jeans.  
“Ready?”  
“Ready.”  
“Alright. At the 10.” You start counting together “1…2…10!” you push yourself away from the wall and with Josh’s help you manage to free yourself from the window, falling back on top of him on the floor.

You turn around to see Josh wheezing and grinning at you, one of his hands already making its way back on your hip. “So… no foreplay?” You just roll your eyes and smile before pulling him in a tight hug and kissing him again.  
You feel his tongue slipping past your lips, his knee between your legs and his hands roaming your hips, caressing the skin between your jeans and your shirt. You arch your back and moan into the kiss: you had really missed all of this. Missed him.  
The minutes passed without the two of you realizing it: the cold you had felt before was drawn away by Josh’s kisses, you could feel your heart thumping in your ears, and you barely realized when the cable car arrived again with another passenger.

“Jeez, guys, get a room!” You two stare blankly at Ashley, before she grabs her bags and walks away from the cable car station. You look back at Josh and are able to maintain a serious face for half a second before you two burst out laughing at the same time; he winds his arm around you and brings you closer to him, while you just exhale deeply while resting your head on his chest. “I love you.” He raises his head at your comment: he caresses your cheek with the back of his fingers and gently motions you to look up at him. “Love you too, beautiful.”  
You quickly steal another kiss from him before standing up and pulling him up with you.  
Once retrieved the shovel and your backpack from the bench, you joined Joshua at his side while walking up the mountain to catch up with Ash, telling each other about the last few days that you’ve been apart and mostly gossiping about Chris and Ashley.


	2. Clingy. Lovely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler! Lame John Wayne quote just ahead!!  
> Also, Josh is clingy af. Guess it’s okay with him being depressed, and I guess his bromance with Chris speaks for itself…

21:27 – Ten hours until dawn

You reached the lodge hand in hand with Josh: the weather was still chilly but he was more than willing to wrap you in his arms when you complained about the cold.  
“Thank you.” You replied shyly, before he kissed the tip of your nose, making you giggle, and that’s enough to bring a smile back to his lips again. It felt so unreal to see him this happy after all those months spent comforting him from his daily nightmares. At least you saw Hannah and Beth just when you slept: for him, it was an endless torture. But now, here he was, laughing like a five year old child while pulling you by your hand towards the big wooden house.

Maybe it was for the best. Damn, it had to be: you had seen him go through enough. He deserved to be happy again.

“I need to go check a few things around here. Don’t get lost while I’m away, will ya?”  
“I think I can handle it.” You reply calmly with a lopsided grin. He is about to leave, when he turns back to you, as if remembering something.  
“Oh, and stay away from the windows, please. Once a day is enough, right?” he winks at you teasingly, but you just roll your eyes and turn away from him, crossing your arms on your chest. “Just fuck off already.” He gets near you and wraps his arms around you, pulling your back closer to his chest. “You know I love you so so much?” he says tilting his head and nuzzling his nose on your cheek “Yeah. Whatever.” 

“Ehi.” He tips you slowly, to the point you need to lean into him to remain in balance, his arms still around you. Not hearing a reply from you, he shakes you a little, making you groan. “What?” you state bluntly. “I’m not leaving you if you’re mad at me.” He says in a whisper, a grin playing on his lips.

“I’m not mad at you.”

“Gimme a kiss then.”

“Not feelin’ like it right now.” You tilt your head in the opposite direction of his, turning away from him as much as possible from your current position.  
“Aww, come on.” He gently kisses your neck, bringing the shadow of a smile back to your face. “Not happening, Joshua.” He keeps leaving a trail of kisses on your throat and jaw. “Please. You know you can’t resist my unquestionable and unique charm.” You give in and lean into him, kissing his lips playfully a couple of times before turning around and putting your hands on his chest, warming them underneath his jacket. “Don’t take too long, alright?” he just hums appreciatively before leaving another kiss on your forehead and turning around to go check things out.

You turn around and have a look at your surroundings: it’s like the place hasn’t changed over the last year, every single wooden board still in its place. You shrug into your coat and make your way towards the panoramic point of view: there, you found Ashley fumbling with her backpack. She just glances up at you and looks back to her things with a smile on her face. “Well (y/n), it’s nice seeing you and Josh together again.”  
You smile “It’s been quite a while.” You admit. “I’m glad you stack around. He looks like he could use someone like you.” She gives you a reassuring smile before continuing “And if you could do that while being somewhere more private and not accessible to anyone I think we would all appreciate it.” You scratch the back of your neck, embarrassed “Ehhm… yeah, sorry about before.” You murmur with a faint blush creeping up your cheeks, but she just replies to you with another smile “Tch, don’t worry about that: you two are really cute together, you know?” You smile to yourself, lowering your gaze. “Y-yeah. I know.”  
Ashley looks up at you and you try to shift subject “Speaking of cute together, what about you and Chris?” This time Ashley was the one to have a dark blush spreading on her face. “W-w-what do you mean?!”

“Aw, c’mon!” you throw your hands up in the air “He’s so obvious! You know he likes you, right?” Ash looks down at her feet, while slowly standing up. “W-well… yes. I mean, no!” You smile at her while she tries to explain “Nonononono! It’s… it’s complicated, alright!?!”  
You just grin widely and let her grab the binoculars, listening while she mumbled about the oh-so-beautiful landscape, and why don’t we do this more often, and yes we should just stop talking nonsense and admire the view. You say as she suggests and look towards the horizon, which by now looked like a snow apocalypse descending on earth; you inhale deeply in the chilly mountain air, feeling your shoulders relax as you exhale. That’s when you feel a hand creeping out of nowhere and grabbing the back of your neck, a sudden yell shaking you abruptly out of your fantasies.

You snap around screaming just to find Matt bent laughing at you. “Oh my god (y/n), you should have seen your face!” You slowly lower your fists, which you had raised unconsciously in a fighting stance when you had felt threatened. “Matt! You jerk!” you playfully hit his arm and he retreats, brushing the spot you had just hit. “I could have hurt you badly, y’know!” he just scoffs at you “C’mon, (y/n), I saw you playing football. It’s not like I will ever feel threatened again after seeing _that_.” You lower your gaze and brush the tip of your foot on the floor “…I am more a baseball type anyway…”  
Matt glances behind you and greets Ashley, who was still looking intently in the telescope. “Ehi Ash!” she winced and finally let go of the binocular, fumbling with her hands as her eyes met Matt’s.  
“Oh, Matt? I-I hadn’t heard you.” You stare at the girl intently “Really? He’s been laughing his ass off ‘till now!” “Shut your mouth, (y/s)!” he bites back with a playful grin on his lips. You just shake your head and sight a tartan spot in the distance walking towards you. “Sorry dude, gotta help my man down there.” You say while patting his shoulder and leaving to descend the short set of stairs that separated you from Josh. You leave Matt and Ashley argue about the binoculars and trot happily back towards him: 

“Ehi babe! Any chance we get inside _before_ I turn into a popsicle?” you say shivering. He shakes his head, shrugging “The lock is frozen. Happens sometimes.”

“Jee. No other way to get in?”

“Don’t think so.”

“And there’s nothing to do about the lock? I mean – if it happens so often, haven’t you got something prepared for this kind of situation???”  
He shrugs again and pouts at you. “Nope.”  
You groan and walk towards the stairs that led to the grounds just outside the lodge, Josh following you suit. “So daddy Robert didn’t have nothing prepared for this kind of situation? I’m disappointed.” Josh frowns at you “Stop calling him like that! It makes me shiver. And not in a good way.” You chuckle and intertwine your fingers with his, making your way towards the big wooden house. “You know your father has a liking for me. That should be a point in my favor!” “Yeee- no.”

“Can I have a look at the lock?” Josh shrugs “Sure. I don’t think you can do any better than me though.” you just scoff at him and start walking up the stairs that lead to the lodge’s main door. You kneel in front of the door to inspect more carefully the iced lock, but there’s not a lot to do except wait for spring to come. Even if you had used the lighter again, it would have taken quite some time. You shake your head and turn to look up to Josh.  
“You are 100% sure there’s no other way round?” he taps his chin thoughtfully, looking in the distance. “I don’t know if there’s another door that we might get open…” “Maybe… maybe not doors…” Josh looks at you curiously “What do you mean?” “Well, I mean, maybe there’s another way to access the basement, or – I dunno – a window, perhaps?”  
A smile creeps on his lips “You mean, breaking into my house?” you blush lightly, thinking back at the time when you wanted to keep your relationship with Josh a secret to the others and so the two of you had managed to find almost any way to avoid Hannah and Beth when meeting. “It’s not like I haven’t done that before.” You say brushing your neck lightly. 

“If I recall correctly, there’s a loose window just on the other side of the house.” You say shyly. “Aww, it’s the one from the first time I helped you break into my room in secret. Relationship goals!” he says dreamily, while raising his fist for you to hit it. You look at him, then his fist, then back to him and walk down the stairs, hearing a faint “You’re breaking my heart here, (y/n)!”  
You walk around the lodge to find said window, the shutters banging loudly on the wooden walls, but not loud enough to be noticed above the wind. Josh reaches you and follows your gaze. “So, how do you plan on reaching it?” “Uhhm. Didn’t really think about it yet.” You stare at the window for a couple of minutes, unable to think about anything safe enough to reach upstairs. “If we had Matt _and_ Mike, maybe they could push me up there…” “It’s kinda high. You sure?” you turn to him and reply “Or we stay out here and freeze to death.” “Joy of joys…” he mumbles in return.

“C’mon, there must be a way in! It’s your house, dammit!” “If there’s, I don’t see it from here.” You grab your head between your hands, frustrated, then puff softly in defeat, shaking your head. “As wise men say, ‘Life is hard. It’s harder if you’re stupid.’” Josh made a face at you, surprised you still remembered that line “You just didn’t quote John Wayne, did you?” you give him a proud glance over your shoulder and smile at him “What if I did?” he steps in front of you and squeezes your shoulders. ”You’re so gonna get laid tonight.” You laugh at him. He ignores you and looks up to the lodge again, saying: “Just wait ‘till we get inside.” 

“ _If_ we get inside.”


	3. Warm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry the reader is a little shit :/ can’t help it. Also, Chris has cats.

22:00 – Nine hours until dawn  
You had been sitting outside for ten minutes straight, and you had discovered that you just needed that little amount of time to start feeling like the cold had penetrated into your bones and for your teeth to start beating inside your mouth while quick shivers ran down your spine. 

You hear a loud yell and stand up from the stair on which you were sitting just to see Chris and Josh greeting each other. You get near them and open your arms “Chris, my favorite nerd!” he welcomes your embrace, wrapping his arms around you ”It’s been _so long_ man, I was wondering whether your cats had already started eating your corpse!” He squeezes you tighter “My my, (y/n), how comes nobody hasn’t tried to strangle you yet?” the others exchange glances and smiles with each other but you don’t care. They couldn’t possibly understand. You let go of him and take a step back “What can I say, depression isn’t trying hard enough in this period!”  
Grim humor. That’s the only thing that kept you afloat at the times when your depression was actually kicking you badly. You and Chris weren’t really close, not like he was with Josh or Ash, but he was the only one who had actually noticed it and the only one that helped you pass your crisis safely; you couldn’t stab yourself if you had the urgent impulse of stabbing him, as he used to say.  
He quickly disappeared with Josh behind the house and you went back sitting on the stairs, chatting with the other girls (and Matt) to distract yourself before Chris tried to scare you with a ghostly yell from the other side of the door. While Sam and Ash flinched, you just wrapped yourself tighter in your coat, yelling “Lame, Chris!”  
It didn’t take long for him to open the door and after the tiger- I mean – ‘baby wolverine’ accident, you were able to get inside.

“Flamethrower? In a wooden house? That’s just sweet, man!”

“Hey – Hey hold on. It was your boyfriend who thought this” he stops to shake the deodorant can and the lighter in front of your face “was a good idea.”

“Oh. Fine then.” You walk past Chris inside the lodge while he gives you a ‘Oh, really?’ look.  
“Hey, it’s his house. If he wants to burn it down, that’s none of my business!” you say shrugging.

You walk with the others inside the place, warming your hands with your breath as you make your way in the hallway: the lodge wasn’t that much warmer compared to the outside, but at least there was no wind. You glance at the furniture and notice some photos of the girls. You stare at them for a moment before reaching for one of them: it was you, Beth, Sam and Josh at your junior prom. It looked like ages had passed since that night: before Mike had started officially being part of your group, before Hannah’s crush on him, before… everything. You feel hot tears welling up your eyes but you fight them back and inhale sharply before turning around and meeting Josh’s gaze.

“You alright?” he asks, concern twisting his features. You nod before lowering your eyes on the photo and putting it back in its place.  
Damn it. Josh had to have noticed it. You were the one supposed to look after him, not the other way round. You bite your lip as he adjusts the photo so it is in the exact same spot as before.  
He then turns to you and cups your cheek, brushing your lips with his thumb. You just stare at him, without speaking, before pulling him into a hug. 

He may not want to talk about it, but his sisters were dead. It was a fact that he wanted to face in his own way, meaning he didn’t want to face it at all. No matter how many times you replayed that video – how hard you tried to believe it was the old Josh Washington speaking again - you didn’t believe he really wished to move on. You mentally noted to yourself to speak to him, once you had a spare moment alone.

You loose your grip on him “Sorry.” You mumble.  
“It’s okay.” He’s still keeping you in his arms, brushing lightly your sides. “Are you still taking your pills?” You widen your eyes realizing you had skipped them today “Y-you’re right.” You kneel down to fish the little container in your backpack and swallow a couple of the ill-colored pills.  
“How did you know I had skipped on them?” he smiles at you, bittersweet “We used to take them at the same hour at the clinic, remember?” you just nod, remembering the first time you had met. You were still in middle school. You had just moved from another city, barely knew anyone. It wasn’t difficult to fall back in depression.  
You had arrived at the clinic with your wrists patched up and stitched from the base of your thumb to the middle of your forearm. He was all wrapped up in gauze and had a broken arm: as you later discovered he had tried to jump out of a window. Well, he _did_ jump out of a window.  
You knew him since you were in class together, though you had never talked to each other until then. You realized you loved the way he smiled at you. It took you a year away from him, following your mother as she moved in another city because of her job, to fully realize it. You were in love with Josh Washington.

Chris always said how it was the magic of the butterfly effect, that it was destiny somehow, while you just scoffed at him and asked if he had already finished this month’s number of _‘the Bride’_ ; but he was right: your depression had actually brought you into Joshua’s arms.  
You smile at Josh before patting his shoulder and joining the others in the middle of the hall.

“If you two have finished sniffing at each other, we’d like some fire here!” you hear Sam calling from the other side of the hall. “What’s the magic word?” Josh replied with that smug grin of his. Emily walked in front of him, shivering. “Now.” Josh exchanged a glance with Chris and took a deep breath “I’ll see what I can do.”  
You stayed with the others as Josh knelt beside the fireplace, trying to light it up. You glanced at the rest of the group: you had known Sam for a long time, since you had been Beth’s best friend; it wasn’t unusual for the two of you to hang out with the twins, or have sleepovers. Chris was at times assuming the role of your older brother, protecting you from anything bad that might have happened to you, and yet other times you had to play the role of the big sister, trying to return the favor; you and Josh had been trying to put Ashley and Chris together for the past two years, but everything seemed to have failed until now. You had even tried to lock them in the basement once, but Chris – who generally had the strength and will to move of a sloth in a lucid coma – had managed to push the door open – with you and Josh leaning on it with all your weight to make it really look like the lock had busted – just to escape from a situation of mild intimacy with Ashley. Oh, dear little Ashley. You pitied her at times, since neither she nor Chris seemed to want to make the first move, even though they were clearly perfect for each other.  
Emily and Matt, on the contrary, were the ones you knew less: you got along pretty well with Matt, since he was the easy going type, while Emily… well, let’s just say she wasn’t in the top ten of your favorite people. 

‘Or top fifty’ you mumble to yourself as you look at her bullying Matt about something.

You hadn’t realized the others were talking as well; you just manage to catch Chris’ last sentence: “Tweedlewhisker would have hated this place!”

‘Oh no.’ you tell yourself. ‘Not this again.’ 

Sam smirks at Chris, confused “What’s a Tweedlewhisker?”

You just shrug, exhaling deeply “His alienated cat.”

“You just say so because you don’t like him.” “The damn thing _barked_ at me once!” “It was the neighbours’ dog, what are you talking about?!” “It was the cat, I tell you!”

You two were nose to nose by now, yelling at each other, when Matt tried to interrupt. “Ehm… guys?” you and Chris stare him down, making him pause before continuing “Y-you okay down here? From the fireplace I had the feeling you were talking crazy.” Sam shrugs, a grin on her face “Oh, it _was not_ a feeling.”

You decide to slip away from Chris’ conversation about his adorable weirdo-cat and decide to go check the rooms: you make your way into the place, already knowing which room Josh had picked for the two of you. You walk down the corridor, the wooden floor creaking lightly under your weight, until you reach the door at the end of it: you slowly turn the doorknob, peeking inside the place; you open the door fully, looking at the beautiful window just on top of the double bed: you could see everything outside – meaning, you could have seen everything, if it wasn’t for the snow and the darkness already painting the entire world outside in a blurred shade of black. You leave your backpack down and start looking around the dark room, spotting a little desk near one of the walls and, on top of it, something you couldn’t quite focus on from your position; you walk near the desk and grab the unknown object, realizing it’s a candle.  
Looking around, you spot another couple of them around the room, also thanks to your view adapting to the darkness. You almost flinch when you see the silhouette of someone leaning on the door frame. “Like what I did here?” you look back at the candle, smiling sweetly “I have to guess you were planning to spend some of that quality time with me... tonight?” he gets closer and finally a cloud moves out of the way, leaving you two bathed in moonlight. His arms pull you into a loose hug and he kisses the top of your head “Anything for you, (y/n).” you return the hug and rest your head on his chest, hearing his heart beating deeply. “I’m so glad we found each other... You’re the best thing I’ve got.” You heard some thumping from the hallway and Emily yelling at someone. Jess, probably.  
You puff lightly and loosen your grip on Josh, while the two of you tilt your heads to listen more carefully. “I can’t believe they’re at it again.”

22:28

You two walk back into the main hall just to see the two girls barking insults at each other.  
“STOP IT!” everyone in the room turns to look at Josh “This is not why I wanted you here. This is not – helping.” You embrace his arm as he tells Mike about a cabin and you watch silently as Matt and Emily walk out of the lodge – another stupid bag, you think you’ve overheard. He exhales deeply when the two couples have finally left the lodge. “Just wish they understood…” you hear him mumble as he pinches the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index, his eyes closed. “Hey.” You murmur softly, making him look up at you. “This is our night, okay? No spoiled cheerleader is gonna ruin it, mmh?” he smiles and nods at you.

“I’ll be waiting in our room. Don’t take too long.”


	4. Close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bone Zone! Alright sorry I HAD to say it

22:39 – Nine hours until dawn

You strode to the room and closed the door behind you, leaning on it and taking a deep breath: you couldn’t believe you had actually a chance to spend some time with Josh again. You unzipped your coat and left it on the chair near the desk, then used your right feet to pull away your left boot and vice versa. The feeling of the wooden floor underneath your feet was actually odd: cold and comfortingly warm at the same time. You take the lighter from your pocket and light the candle on the desk, putting it away and using the candle to walk around the room: you spot many others and start making your way towards them, lighting them one by one with the already lit candle.

You remember about something you had promised yourself before: you had to check on how Josh was taking all of this. You knew it was probably the worst way of dealing with it, but you didn’t know what to do: beating around the bush wasn’t helping, you had to make sure he was doing good.  
Still, you felt like something was holding you back: you realized it was not Josh who didn’t want to talk about it; maybe… maybe even you didn’t want to.  
It’s not like you hadn’t left the lodge mentally scarred: you had been frequently visiting your old therapist for a couple of months; mainly forced by your mum, that’s true, but you still did it anyway. You thought it was nothing – you _acted_ like nothing happened, and yet…  
You exhale deeply. Of all the times you could have faced your ascending depression, you felt like this was the worst.

You are shaken back to reality when you feel a stinging pain biting your thumb: a drop of wax had fallen from the candle you were still holding in your hand; you immediately grab it away (it had already solidified just by making contact with your skin) and suck at your mauled thumb, letting your tongue ease away the burn. “Damn it.” You mutter, before pacing back to the desk and putting the candle back in its place.  
You slowly get your jeans off as well as your wool socks, gently peeling away your flannel shirt and leaving on just a black lace vest and your underwear. You sit in the middle of the bed and stare outside, where you can still spot the trees moving in the night sky.

When you are finally feeling relaxed again a quick movement catches your attention. You hear a low shriek and you try to spot anything in the darkness just outside of the window, but you don’t find anything there. You hear steps approaching the door and as soon as your thoughts snap back to Josh you mark the strange noises as the forest sleeping and the movement as an animal or probably just your imagination: no need to spoil the night for a little reverie of yours.

You turn to the door just in time to see Josh opening it, leaning on the frame with one hand while gripping a wine bottle in the other. “Heeey, porn star.” He says while scanning your body up and down. You smile and motion him to come closer to you. He enters the room and kicks the door closed, never breaking eye contact with you. He kneels on the bed and wraps his arms around you, kissing you lovingly and making you fall on your back, positioning himself between your legs; his hands trace the curve of your hip before he breaks the kiss “I’ve been waiting all day for this.” “You’re preaching to the choir, love.” He gently strokes your hip with the back of his hand, gazing at you heavy lidded. “You know, I wasn’t sure you’d come back this year.” You feel your limbs stiffen around him, but you make your best to mask it. “Is that so?” you manage to whimper. He leans back on your neck and tilts his head so that he can whisper into your ear “Thank you for being here.” He murmurs before leaving a trail of kisses down your neck.

“J-Joshua…” you whisper, barely catching your breath as his hands run down your sides once more and make their way under your shirt. You feel one of his hands cupping your breast and stroking it gently through your bra while the other was left at your side, him leaning on his elbow to keep his balance and slowly tugging at the back of your bra to remove it. You suddenly sit up, feeling the cold wine bottle toppling behind your back and Josh’s hands finally unclasping the hook of your bra. Before letting him remove it you tug at his shirt to make him look at you and command in a low tone to take it off.  
He gladly complies and stares at you in awe as you remove your bra and toss it at the other end of the bed, letting it join his shirt on the floor. He leans forward, his hands at both of your sides, and gives you another open-mouthed kiss. “L-let’s just… slow down, ok?” he grabs the bottle from behind you and stands up, moving backwards toward the desk and never letting his eyes gaze at anything but your beautiful skin. “I want to take this as slowly as we can.” At that comment, you think about the others, and immediately ask about them. “What about Chris and Ash?” He turns around and opens the first drawer of the desk, taking out of it a corkscrew. “No worries, I’ve handled the situation pretty well.” He says turning back to you, smirking and winking. He works the bottle open as he explains his wicked plan “Told them to look for a spirit board in the basement, it’s going to take a while since it’s full of movie memorabilia. Besides, you know how Chris is: if you give him a chance to fool around, he’s gonna take it without regrets.” The bottle pops open and Josh opens the second drawer of the desk, taking out of it two glasses.  
“You have really thought this through, haven’t you?” He just shrugs, mumbling “I had plenty of time to organize the thing”

You turn to the big window, and look up at the cleared sky: so many stars shining up there. “What about Sam?”

You were looking away. This was his chance.  
Josh takes a little pill out of his pocket, and puts it in your glass while pouring the wine.

“She’s in the bathroom. It’s gonna take her a while.” “Mhh. The bathtub, is it?”

He just needed some more time to let it dissolve into the wine, then his plan would have been set: his show could finally start.

“Damn, we should have taken the bathroom.” You mumble to yourself, fantasizing about a good morning spent with Josh and your beloved bathtub. “You know, Beth had lured me here using that bathtub the first time.” You smile to the memory of the first days you had met the Washingtons: they really felt like a family, looking after each other, while you had just your mother that, even though she did the best she could, wasn’t able to stick around while you grew up as much as you had wanted her to. You hadn’t heard of your father since you were four, the last memory of him was the police officers taking him away, your mother shakily hugging you as she whispered to you everything would have been fine from then on. Hell, how wrong had she been.  
Your father hitting you as a child was probably the main cause of your depression – you didn’t need a doctor to tell you that. You didn’t know how to feel about it since following Chris’ reasoning on the butterfly effect it was the main reason you had met with Josh.

“(y/n)? You okay?”

You blink several times before realizing you had been staring at a point in front of you for a couple of minutes now, while you were thinking about everything else.

“Y-yeah. Sorry, I think I zoned out a little.” You say smiling, forcing away the thought that kept telling you you had been doing it more and more lately.

“Here.” Josh hands you a glass and you accept it gladly, lifting it towards him. “Cheers.” You drink eagerly, not noticing Josh staring at you for the entire time, trying to detect any sign that might imply you had caught a glimpse of the taste of the sleeping pill he had just put in it.  
You finish the glass and leave it on the night stand, drying your mouth with the back of your hand.  
“Now, where were we?”

He finishes his drink and puts the glass on the desk, stepping towards the bed while unbuttoning his jeans. He sits beside you on the bed, kissing you passionately. His hands stroke again your breasts through the shirt and it doesn’t take long for him to help you remove you last garments, leaving you in nothing but your bare skin. He bites his lower lip as he crawls up to you leaving kisses on your neck and chest. You whimper as he strokes your inner tight up to your core, gently circling your slit with his forefinger.  
“J-jo-sh…” he silences you with another kiss, making you moan into it when he slides a finger into you, his thumb pressing delicately on your clit. “Please… I want-…” you try to reach for his crotch but he pushes you down while still pumping into you. “Uh-uh. Not yet, darling.”  
You bite down on your lip, thinking about the unfair situation: he still even had his pants on! You weren’t going to let him get away with it.

You suddenly grab his wrist and pull him out of you, while making the both of you roll on the bed: you pin his arms above his head and rest on his lap, rubbing yourself against him.  
He is still startled, looking at you pleadingly; “Alright, sorry. I didn’t-“ he is cut off by you brushing yourself against his pants insistently, and you see how he squeezes his eyes shut and bites his lip while desperately trying not to shout your name. “This is so evil, (y/n)!!” you look back at him when his eyes turn into an almost painful expression: you could feel him throbbing against your thigh, even through his jeans.

You let go of his arms and he stares at you for a second before sitting up and cupping your face with both hands, pulling your mouth towards his; you finish undoing his pants and you hear him sigh when you pull his boxers down and free his length. He pants lightly “That’s better.”  
You kiss him lovingly as you look into his pockets: you feel the little plastic envelope crackle underneath your fingertips and you pull it out of his pocket and raise it at your eye level, breaking your kiss to look at Josh.  
“You’re so predictable, Washington.” He just smiles back at you as he helps you roll the condom down his shaft. You give him a couple of strokes before letting him align with your entrance, but you lose control once more when his hips buck up to meet yours instead of waiting for you to sit on him. You gasp in surprise and he mumbles a little “Sorry.” before doing it again, his eyes closed shut.

He manages to stop himself from doing it a third time and opens his eyes to look up at you “You feel so good around me, (y/n).”  
You slowly start your own pace squeezing lightly every time you take him in completely; you lower to kiss him and let him roll again, finding yourself at the bottom once more. He quickly speeds up and in matters of minutes you are frantically clinging to his shoulders, digging your nails into his skin.  
You hear a distant yell from the hallway, possibly Chris; you were making a great effort to try to think right now. “Guys! We found the spirit board!”  
Josh glances at you and then tilts his head towards the door “We’re coming!”

You widen your eyes and feel your cheeks flush at the double sense, but you have no time to complain before he slides his hand between your thighs and buries his face in the crook of your neck. “Come for me, babe. C’mon.”  
His fingers rhythmically massage your clit until you topple over the edge, forgetting completely about the others and screaming his name. Your spasms drag him with you, as he rides his orgasm sucking at your neck. You don’t realize the pain of the hickey until minutes later, but for now, you’re happy laying underneath him, exchanging sweet nothings to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I could blame 2 Broke Girls for that horrible double sense but no, it came from the deep of my heart <3


	5. Ghosts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry - not sorry. Gonna skip some parts because you played the game, I played the game, and there’s no reason for me to keep blabbing about a seance. Of course you did, don’t tell me you just stumbled across this fic, I know it! Else you wouldn’t have fallen for Josh’s endless problems :B unless you’re a hopeless Rami Malek fan like me. If that’s the case, I’m not a frigging videogame, go look at this scene somewhere else for the complete version!

23:02 – Eight hours until dawn

You scrambled up the stairway as the others were waiting for you to start the séance. You had taken some more time than Josh to put your clothes on: the toughest part was standing up from the bed, since it was so comfy back then and just _smelled_ like him at that point; although you had to admit you felt a little dizzy from time to time. No wonder after what Josh had just done to you! – said the optimistic and over-willing too forgetful part of you, forcing away another bad thought linked to your mental stability.

You met Chris halfway on the stairs. “We were waiting for you.” He says calmly. “Sorry, I had to… brush my teeth.” “Oh, it’s called brushing teeth now?” you just stare him dead in the eye before walking past him and getting near the candle lights. “Is that a hickey on your neck?” You stop and turn around slowly, facing him once more. “Yes, I brushed the wrong spot. I just get soo distracted when people ask me to come.” Chris seems to link your words with what Josh had answered him before, making his cheeks turn a bright red. “Oh. Oh-ookay.” He takes off his glasses and polishes them on his shirt before following you up the stairs.

“(y/n)! Finally!” Ash greets you from the other side of the table. “Chris just read us the rules.”  
He grins at you, taking the seat next to you “Want me to read ‘em again?” Josh turns to you, an already tired expression on his face “Please don’t.” he pleads.  
You just shake your head at the both of them “Thanks Chris, but it’s not my first rodeo.” He looks surprised by your statement. “You’ve… done this before?”  
“She was actually the one to introduce me and my sisters to the Ouija board.” Josh explained in your place. Ashley and Chris looked back at you, silently asking for an explanation. You carefully take the pointer and place it in the middle of the board, looking at it silently, trying to find the right words. You decide being blunt is the best course of action.

“My dad was arrested when I was very young. Back then I didn’t care, I didn’t even try to talk to him, but one day… a police officer called us home. I answered it, and… he told me my father had been slain, during a revolt.” You pause for a second to let your words sink in, tracing the contour of the pointer with your forefinger. “I have tried to… to talk to him ever since.”

“Did he ever answer you?” Ash asked with a trembling voice.

“Sometimes. Sometimes he didn’t.” you wickedly grin at her. “Sometimes something much worse answered my call.” You looked as Ashley trembled as a leaf while Chris just leant back on his chair staring at the board, silently. “Sooo… when do we start?” he tells you with a lopsided grin.  
“Guys! This is serious, please!” Josh exclaims as he takes his place next to you. “(y/n)? Could you please be our medium?” you nod lightly and place your index on the pointer, waiting for everyone else to do the same. When you start asking your questions, you don’t feel like there was the same air you felt when you had actually – or so it seemed – contacted someone.

You inhale sharply when you understand who is talking to you.  
“Hannah? Is that you?” the pointer slowly makes his way towards the ‘yes’. Ashley and Chris keep apologizing for everything that happened, while you are at a loss of words: it has never happened to you that a spirit manifested so plainly. No games, no riddles, no unreasonable answers, not even _once_ – that was a hell of a personal record.  
You look up at Josh, trying to understand what he’s thinking right now. Poor Josh – you didn’t want to see him go through this. “Josh” you murmur “You okay with this?” he just nods, but you spot a tear at the edge of his eye “I’m fine.” You gulp lightly “We can stop if you-“ “I SAID I’M FINE!”

The three of you fall silent and stare at Josh, who takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.” You squeeze his forearm in a reassuring gesture before continuing with the questions.

23:15

“Library? Uh…” Chris kept following the pointer, while you just kept reading the letters out loud. “T-There’s… proof, in the library?” Ashley looks up to Chris “Maybe we should start looking there!” As you glance in Ashley’s direction you spot a pale girl, dressed entirely in white, with long black locks staring in your direction. “What the f-!!!” you don’t have time to warn the others – who just look puzzled at you – as the pointer flies off the table and you snap back so suddenly you make the chair topple and fall on your back on the floor.  
When you stand up again, the ghost is gone. “Jesus H. Christ, what the hell was that?!” you yell leaning your hands on the table. “What do you mean?” Ashley asks, not sure about the part you are referring to “There was a fucking ghost, not even five feet from us!!” you look at Chris, who is still trying to put the pieces together “I-I-I-I don’t know, (y/n). I didn’t see anything.”

Just then your eyes fall upon Josh, who had silently stood up from his chair. “N-no. This is not real. This can’t be real.” “Josh-“ “I-I don’t know if you think messing up with me is gonna help me deal with my grief or what, but IT’S NOT WORKING!” “Josh, wait-“ “Dude, we didn’t mean- really!” “NO, STOP IT!”  
He is descending the stairs before you even have the chance to speak to him “YOU GUYS ARE FULL OF IT!!” you look at his back while he walks away and instantly feel like someone punched you in your guts.

“Damn it.” You murmur as you lean again on the table, your other hand up to your eyes to ease you and try to make you think straight. What just happened? You had done nothing on purpose, that’s for sure. And ghosts? They existed just in horror movies, at least in the version of the carbon copy of Samara from _‘the Ring’_ you had just seen. So what the hell did just happen?!?  
You snap out of your thoughts as Chris slowly chuckles “Jesus, man, if you were faking it-“ “I was not, Chris!” you immediately cut him off. “I’d never do this to Josh. You know it.” You open your eyes as you realize just now something that should have dawned upon you earlier. “Was it you?!?”  
“What? No! Why would we do this???” Chris immediately answered you, but that’s not whom you were addressing. You point an accusatory finger toward Ashley, knowing full well her part in the prank of last year. “Are you here just to mess up with Josh again?! Don’t you think Hannah and Beth were enough!?” “W-what are you saying?” “I’m saying you did this on purpose, and I’m sick of it!!”  
Chris protectively puts a hand in front of Ash, making you look at him “Ash and I are Josh’s friends, and we want anything but to hurt him more. I know you want to protect him, but accusing Ash out of nothing won’t surely help us!” Somewhere, in a little part inside of you, you cheer for Chris standing up for Ashley. But the rest of you – the part whose protective instincts had just started tingling really bad – just gave Ashley a death glare, not giving up yet on your theory.  
Ashley’s eyes widen as she lifts her hands up in defense. “I was just sitting in front of you, (y/n)! Besides, it was Josh asking us to do this, and you were controlling everything!”  
Another thought crosses your mind now: what if – and I’m saying _if_ – you were simply losing it? You were the one talking to the ghost after all. It was not difficult to pull the pointer where you wanted it to land, you had done it countless of times to prank your friends. You never did this with Josh though – but _what if_ you had just did, and didn’t even realize it? You had seen the ghost after all. No one else. It may have not been a ghost, but what about hallucinations? You knew them far too well and the only thought of being trapped again in that mental prison made a shiver run down the full length of your spine.  
Your optimistic part tried again to grab all these thoughts and stuff them away, but it was a titanic feat even for the imaginary part of you that kept your brain clean and spotless.

You had to find Josh. NOW.

You barely glance at Chris and Ashley as you turn to make your way downstairs, but you don’t even know where to begin with: the lodge is just so immense and the little voices inside your head questioning your mental sanity are making you drench your clothes in cold sweat. You curl up your hands in fists and open them again for a couple of times, trying to bring yourself back to reality and _stick_ with it. You try to focus – think – where would Josh go? Where would I want to go if I were in his state?

You glance back at your hands still curling up and opening, seeing your nerves tensing underneath you skin. You gulp again, correcting yourself: _where do I want to go right now?_  
You immediately think about your room. _That’s the first place I would look for him, after all._ And if he knew you even just one tiny bit, he knew you wouldn’t have given up on him. Not now, nor ever.

You had never realized how BIG the lodge was. It was simply immense and the realization struck you as you struggled to find your way back to your room. You felt your head spinning, and the nausea wasn’t helping at all. You leant on a wall and tried to keep your intestines where they were, without puking anything in the process. You passed a hand on your forehead and realized it was really cold, though you were sweating. You shook your head and kept moving on until you found your way back to Josh’s door. You didn’t know how much time had passed – you just felt so _damn cold._

You leant on it and as it opened you stumbled forward and fell on the floor. You tried to stand up but your arms didn’t want to hear any of it and so you leant back on the wooden floor. Just then you notice a strange sound – vaguely remembering you Darth Vader from the star wars franchise. You try to look back but a hand pins you on the floor, gripping the back of your neck. You don’t have the strength to fight back and so you stare absently at the tattered boot in front of you. A tear streams down your face as you whimper. “J-josh…”  
You feel the man’s fingers stiffen around your neck. It lasts just a moment, then he removes it from your body and grips your shoulder, turning you around so you were laying on your back and staring at the ceiling – _at him:_ your vision had begun to blur, but you could still distinguish a very pale face – porcelain, from how the lights played on the edges – and teeth. God, so many teeth. Two black orbs returned your stare as you turned your head on the side, to look away from him – _it._

“This is just a nightmare. Just a nightmare.” You whimper to yourself. “This is NOT happening.” You shut your eyes multiple times but every time you open them _it_ was still there. You notice something shining in its gloved hands.

 _A machete_ – your mind shouts at you as your eyes widen with fear. _It_ lifts it and hits a spot just inches away from your head, making you turn away from it. “God no…” you cry out, still just barely more than a whisper. It looks down at you and grabs the collar of you shirt, pulling you closer to – something – a mask, perhaps?

 _Wait – fucking gas – that’s a fucking gas mask!!_ Your mind shouts out as the other little voices turn into a chorus of fearful pleads: one sticks out in particular…

“J-josh…”

The gas mask is inches away from your face “Help me, please.” _It_ pushes the mask down your face, and you easily drift away into your subconscious.

Yet, you swore you had still overheard something over the voices, something that you were sure you hadn’t dreamt, since your nightmares never shoved pity on you.

**“For what it matters, I’m sorry it has come to this.”**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI, there’s really a ghost in the séance scene: https://i.ytimg.com/vi/HJH9bADqQh0/maxresdefault.jpg  
> I saw it after my fourth playthrough o.o I don't know if I'm just slow or if it's hard to spot.


	6. Run

00:03 – Seven hours until dawn

You quietly shake your head, gaining consciousness again: your limbs are stiff and your mouth dry, but you are holding up in some way. As you crack your eyes open all your vision is filled with black, your pupils not dilated enough to focus on your surroundings. 

You slowly move your body just to curse at yourself as you feel a headache blooming from the middle of your brain, but when you try to grab your temples to massage them you realize your wrists are tied up together and held up your head by something, which kept you lifted from the ground. Your toes were brushing on the floor, but your ankles were tied together as well, and you just managed to brush the back of your feet on the tiles before giving up the idea of standing up.  
You swore you had never felt this sore in your whole life: how long had it been since the séance? You shake your head again, your thoughts still a confused blur. You bite down your lip before forcing yourself to remember the last things that you had seen: you are able to recall two black glassy eyes staring down at you, before the lights switch on making you groan and narrow your eyes in pain.  
You feel your body rotating on itself, hearing a sort of metallic noise – a chain, you guess – making you face another side of the room. You open your eyes, finally seeing what’s in front of you, and scream in horror: pigs – lots and lots of them, all gutted and hung to dry, their mouths still agape, letting the blood drip down from their guts. You scream again – less loudly than before, your voice fading into a mumbled lament – as you turn around and inspect all the bodies surrounding you. Just then you realize how cold the room actually was, seeing your own breath puffing right in front of you. As you feel your jaw tremble for the cold you look down at yourself, staring in disbelief as you find out you’re half naked, your clothes long gone: the only things left were your black bra and matching underwear.

You try to bend your legs nearer yourself, seeking some kind of heat, but you aren’t able to move in your restraints and you easily give up and let them fall back on the ground.  
You look up and see your wrists tied up as you expected, hanging from a hook linked to the ceiling through a shiny chain. A plan to escape all of this starts forming in your mind when the door at the end of the room bangs open and you turn to look up at your captor: covered in a jumpsuit, he was silently and slowly pacing towards you, the black orbs inside his mask never leaving your eyes. You deny him the pleasure of hearing you scream again, biting hard on your inner cheek and keeping your head up and your eyes wide open not to let the tears fall down on your face.

 **“Mpf. A headstrong.”** His voice makes you shiver, every single hair on your body standing on an end, but you still refuse to let him have it his way. **“I like it.”** He says, stopping in front of you and gazing at your bare body.

You lock eyes with him and flinch when his gloved hand reaches for your face, caressing your cheek and taking your chin in between his fingers. You had shut your eyes and you felt the tears squeezing through your eyelids as you felt his face nearing yours: you tried to turn your head away from him but was yanked back as soon as you attempted to do so.  
**“Oh, (y/n).”** you feel frozen stiff, unable to move a single muscle: you bite down at your lips until you feel the skin is about to break, imposing yourself to open your eyes and look at him. **“Soft, broken little (y/n).”**  
You manage to stifle your fear and look back at him. “What do you want?” a chuckle vibrates in his chest **“I’ve been keeping an eye on you for quite a long time.”** He gets even closer, tilting his head to speak in your ear **“Too bad you weren’t with the twins a year ago. We could have had so much fun.”** You feel anger-fueled anguish overwhelming you again and bite his hand, seeing him wince – more startled than hurt, since you had managed to barely catch his thumb in between the thick glove; you wiggle in your bounds, fear twisting your features as you feel hot tears wash your face and fall on your neck, while he takes a step back and watches you squirm.

“You are sick! You’re a fucking maniac!” you yell, but all the strength that had momentarily flooded your body seems to entirely fade away as he laughs at you.  
**“Cute. I can’t wait to see what Josh will do when he’ll find out what I’ve done to you.”** Anger flooded your body again as you forced your head up – even if it hurt like hell – and stared back at him “Don’t you dare laying a hand on Josh, else-“ **“Else what, you are gonna _bite me_ again?”**

His laugh deepens as he turns his back to you, pacing calmly towards the door. **“Later, angel.”** He says before shutting the door and locking it behind him. You relax your limbs and let your head fall down, your chin touching your chest, letting all the tears you were holding fall down your face and body. You sob quietly in the room full of corpses.

 _You’re giving up just yet?_ A voice in the back of your head asks you. _You’re really just going to stay here and cry while that bastard hurts Josh? And Chris? And Mike?_

You frown at it, not sure if listening to the voices was a good idea. Last time you did you had slit your wrists open.  
You shake your head slowly, a silent ‘no’ forming on your lips as you try to focus on how to get out of here. You look up again at the hook that was keeping you lifted from the ground: the chain looked fairly new, but the hook was just a mess, with dried blood eating it slowly. You briefly wonder how many pigs this guy had slaughtered – hoping that was just pig’s blood – silently thanking your good luck nonetheless.  
You take a deep breath and force your arms to bend, getting you nearer the hook; then you suddenly outstretch them, letting yourself fall down. You swear you heard your elbows pop, but you didn’t have time for this. After repeating this for another half dozen of times the rusted hook finally gave in and you fell on the cold tiles of the floor.

 _That’s my girl_ – the voice praises you, making you question again your mental stability.

You groan in pain as you slowly get on your knees. You look for something to free yourself with, though you can spot only the slain pigs so far. Just when you are about to consider the idea of munching the cords away you spot a series of chipped tiles on the wall. You sink your nails underneath one of them and pull it away – with a couple of your nails breaking in the process.  
Little blood runs down your fingers as you cut the ropes with the tile; you had still one problem though: you didn’t know how to get the hell out of there. You inhale deeply, slowly calming you down as you thought about something. You spot a couple of cameras in the room, their intermittent light catching your attention. You bite your lower lip as you curse again: he was looking at you; you hadn’t got much time before he came barging into the room.

You take your head between your hands, desperate to find a way out: you don’t know what to do; looking around you discover the pigs could be actually moved around the place since the chains on the ceiling had a sort of pulley mechanism, but all you could think about was a wall of corpses to defend you, which just wasn’t helping at all; just as your eyes settle on an air conduct that may have just been big enough for you to squeeze through – if you ever found a way to open it – you hear footsteps approaching. In panic, you throw the tile you still had in your hand on the ceiling lights, crushing the bulbs one by one; darkness fills the room once again and you find yourself into another nightmare.

You are quick enough to hide behind one of the pigs as the door opens: you hear him stepping inside the room, sing-songing your name. **“Don’t hide from me, (y/n). Things will just get worse for you.”** You gulp silently as you realize the first thing he’s going to do is look for your feet, since you can’t float in the air. You grip the hook keeping the pig lifted and force yourself up just in time as you perceive a shadow dropping down and looking under the pigs.

You hear him sighing as he stands up again, and you grit your teeth trying to remain as still as possible. He turns to the other side of the room, inspecting a pig without moving too close to it so to stay close to the door in case you tried escaping. You remember about the pulley mechanism and slowly put your feet back on the floor, silently standing up again. You take a deep breath and mentally apologize to the carcass of the poor animal before putting your hands on the corpse and charging the psycho with it; you don’t see anything, you just hear him stumble underneath the pig and you immediately bolt to the door just to fall on the floor when he grabs you by your ankle. You turn around and aim for where his head should be, kicking him off of you.

You start running again, mainly in dark rooms that you had never seen before. You were almost sure this was the old part of the hotel, since there weren’t lots of places around Mount Washington where someone could have been hiding. This meant there had to be a way back to the lodge – which also meant that there was a way out of here. You keep running until you need to stop to breathe: you find a little storage room and you barricade into it: there was still a window on the upper part of the door, so you sit down and wrap your arms around your legs, wheezing heavily. You hear footsteps in the corridor and hold your breath – you hear him getting near you, standing there for a couple of seconds, and then walking away towards the opposite direction. 

00:36

After what seems like an eternity you manage to find a way back to the lodge, tiptoeing carefully your way around the place, in fear of meeting the man again. You walk back up from the basement towards the lodge’s main entrance when you stop dead in your tracks, an all too familiar voice talking to you. 

**“Now you’re really testing my patience, (y/n).”** you feel your hands shake a little, as you try to think of what to do now. You run in the opposite direction of the psycho, circling the room and trying to open any door that’s in your way, just to find them all shut tightly. You hear him chuckle as tears of panic well up in your eyes. **“You’re so predictable. Did you really think I was this stupid?”** You think of any other way out of this place, anything that might get you out of here.  
_Not necessarily a door_ , the voices say, as you look upstairs at the loose window you had told Josh about just hours ago. You run upstairs and start banging on it, hearing the low thuds of the psycho’s footsteps on the stairs. You finally manage to barge the shutters open and you fall down into the snow.

You stand up as fast as you can and start limping towards the woods, ignoring the cold and the stinging pain in your right calf that pleaded you to stop, never looking back.


	7. Seesaw

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inner voices blame Reader for everything and I wonder if I’m scaring you by now.

00:39 – Seven hours until dawn

The adrenaline rush was a distant memory, and you found yourself wandering into the woods, without knowing exactly where to go or wearing any clothes. You were sure you were going to catch a horrible cold if you kept on like this – but after all, what other choices did you have?  
Chris, Sam, Ash, Josh – they could all be dead by now, as far as you knew. The thought made you shiver, but you didn’t notice much with all the other tremors running down your body. You brushed away a tear with the back of your hand and kept walking: you didn’t know where you were headed to, but you knew for sure that if you stopped moving you would have frozen to death.  
Your thoughts lingered back to Matt, Jess and Mike (your brain carefully avoided mentioning Emily): you hadn’t still thought about what could have happened to them. Maybe they were still around here, somewhere. And if they were… you had a chance to overwhelm the psycho. He was just one, after all, while you were still eight – oh right there’s also Emily – nine then!

You brush your hands on your arms, finding yourself wondering how to get in touch with the others. Matt and Em, as far as you knew, were just down the hill, at the cable car. It wouldn’t have taken you long to get to them, while Jess and Mike… that was a a whole different thing.  
Josh had brought you a couple of times at the cabin, but you had never liked it since… well, having sex without anyone bothering you was a thing, while having sex in a creaky cabin set in the middle of the woods on the top of a mountain isolated from everyone and everything else was another one.  
You exhale deeply as you slowly make your way to the path that led to a little tool shack in the Washington’s property, when you heard a shout coming from the distance. It didn’t sound deep and menacing, so you could cross the psycho out of the list of suspects. It sounded actually girlish, you mumble to yourself as you approach the little clearing from where the shout had come. You snoop from the branches to see Chris in front of a mannequin, a spooky mask on top of it. “Jesus, why would anyone do this?”

You take a step closer and Chris hears you and points the torch towards you. “Who's there??” “C-Chris.” you manage to stutter before closing the distance between you and enveloping him in your arms. “God, (y/n), I thought you were dead.” He takes your hands in his and tries to warm them up “Actually, you’re as cold as a corpse!” he looks down at you “And what happened to your clothes???”

“Stop looking at me, Chris!” you snap at him, out of habit. He looks up and you start explaining him, your teeth trembling for the cold. “T-t-there was a man. He k-kid-napped me, wanted to keep me in the old hotel, b-but I managed to flee. God, Chris…” you pause to sniff, holding back tears. “I-I think he got Josh.”  
“Yes. He took Ash too.” You widen your eyes and bite your lower lip. “W-what do we do??” he leaves your hands to unzip his coat “First off,” he says, offering it to you “You get somewhere warm.” “B-but he’s in the lodge!!” Chris sniffs, looking at the ground “No, he’s not.” You follow his gaze and spot dark red trails leading towards the path to the shed. “I’ll go check on them, try to- I don’t know, but we have to do it quickly!!!” You nod and wrap yourself in his coat, running back to the lodge as fast as you can;

00:43

You run up the stairs that lead into the side entrance and cautiously make your way back inside; seeing no sign of the madman around, you start running again, reaching your bedroom: you put on the first clothes you manage to grab, finding a brown shirt and a pair of jeans and discarding Chris’ jacket. You grab one of Josh’s checked shirts and put it on, grabbing your coat as you fumble with your boots as you try to put them back on while running out of the door once more.  
You run up the path leading to the shed, your vision blurring with tears caused by the cold and the wind; you don’t take a lot of time to reach it, and you try to run even faster as you hear yells coming from the inside.

“I’m sorry Josh. I’m so so sorry!!!” you halt harshly in front of the panel separating you and Chris from Ash and Josh. Your eyes stare at the buzz saw slowly moving towards the two of them, a lever in front of you already tilted towards a photo of Josh. “What did you do…” you stutter, still staring at the photo and the lever, trying to process the whole thing and when you finally do, you wish you hadn’t. 

 

The plan was perfect: the night was going better than he could have ever expected. Guts and blood ready, screams revised a hundred of times, it was so-  
“(y/n)?” he mumbles, spotting you on the other side of the door. “What are you doing here?”  
He gets back in character quickly enough for Ashley not to notice. ‘The show must go on.’, he tells himself.  
Whether the mental sanity of his beloved was at stake or not.

 

Chris is crying, and keeps switching glances between you, Josh and Ashley. You feel your blood thumping loudly in your ears and you realize your mind is cutting off Josh and Ashley’s screams, restraining them with a high-pitched noise that was making your head spin.  
You grab Chris’ collar and you yank him down at your eye level “WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE!!” he shakes his head, tears streaming down his face, as he’s just able to murmur “I’m so sorry.”, over and over again.

“BRO, WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS!!” you hear Josh screaming. “…has to be a way. There has to be!!!” you mumble to yourself while looking around you, trying to barge the door open, but nothing. You even try to grab the lever and tilt it because, as bad as it sounds, you preferred seeing a gutted Ashley over a gutted Josh, you couldn’t give up on him like this. The lever didn’t move and you put more strenght on it, but just when it was about to tilt Chris grabbed you, pulling you away from it. You twist in his arms and finally hit him with your elbow in his stomach, but when you reach the lever again it’s too late: you grip the grid separating the four of you and stare in horror as the saw reaches the fork and takes Josh’s path. “No. Nonononono”

“This is not happening. Totally not happening.”

_You wish it was so, do you?_

You hear his screams. The saw whirring, Chris sobbing. Even Ashley pleading.  
It all becomes muffled noise after a while.

_Guess how it feels, being ripped apart from the inside?_

You gulp at the voice’s remark, feeling the sensation it had just described smashing into your stomach, nausea overtaking you again.

You grip the grid tighter, unable to do anything else, staring into Joshua’s eyes without blinking, tears falling on your clothes.  
You swear everything stopped for a moment: the saw, the screaming, the sobbing. Everything was replaced by a whistle in your ears, and a numbing pain spreading from the middle of your stomach to the tip of your fingers.

_It should have been you. You know it, right? If you hadn’t escaped, you would be in his place, and none of this would be happening. **THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.**_

You feel the screams and the sobbing and the rusty smell of the oil and copper fills your mouth as the saw cuts through Josh’s belly.

You overhear yourself screaming his name, banging on the grid, like you had just been witnessing scene, not been part of it. Pleading to any god you knew to save him, to take you instead.  
His body was still whirring lifelessly as the saw cut through the wooden board beside him and came to a halt. You don’t feel your body anymore, everything is numb and you barely remind yourself to breath in between silent sobs. Hot tears keep streaming down your cheeks, the furry collar of your jacket drenched by now.  
Someone reaches for your shoulder – Chris probably – you can’t tell. You lower your gaze and follow Chris and Ash, the nausea and the whistle intensifying with each step you’re taking: when you step outside the cold wind hits your face once more, freezing your tears and making you realize how hot you are. You feel your knees buckle as you flop to the ground and puke, your arms embracing your sides; you don’t have the strength to stand up again, laying there staring at nothing.

You see Chris and Ash at the corner of your eyes coming back for you, grabbing you by both your arms and pulling you up to your feet, forcing you to keep their pace to get away from the shed.

As you kept walking you slowly regained your senses, hearing the snow cracking underneath your feet and Chris and Ashley quietly sobbing. You had stopped crying, though tears were still streaming down your face.  
You move your arms making them understand you can walk by yourself, but then turn back and stride towards the shed. You hear them calling your name until a hand grabs your arm and makes you stop “Where do you think you’re going?!” “Maybe he’s not really dead. Maybe we missed something.” You say, sniffing loudly “A saw cut him in half, (y/n)! There’s no way he’s still alive!” Chris tells you, tears filling his eyes again. “Someone needs to take care of him, Chris! And we all know it’s not going to be you.” You feel your coldness slip away as anger warms your belly, your fists clenching so tight your nails dig into your palms “You- you really are thinking of burying him while there’s a murderer around?!?” “What do you want more? You have already killed him, I’m just trying to fix what you did!” “This will not change anything, (y/n). We have to stick together. Please.” He murmurs while sniffing loudly, blinking the tears at the edges of his eyes away.  
You would have never done what you did if this was a normal situation. But the person you loved most had just died, and you could only see two people responsible for this: the psycho, away who-knows-where causing mayhem, and the other… standing right in front of you.  
Chris barely saw your hook landing on his face: he stumbles backwards and you tackle him to the ground, grabbing his shirt with one hand and punching him with the other. “You just had to fuck up with your stupid prank, mess with him just because you could!” Luckily for him, you weren’t even aiming at his head and he easily parried your punches with his arms. “You were his fucking best friend, Chris! YOU SLAUGHTERED HIM!!!”  
“Stop, (y/n)! Please!” you feel Ashley tugging at your arm before giving up the ‘taming you’ part and yanking your head back by gripping your hair, punching you hard enough to make you fall off Chris. You feel the coppery taste of blood on your tongue and the corner of your mouth is pulsing as warm pain spreads on the right side of your face. She helps Chris get away from you and kneels next to him, inspecting his face. Ashley helps Chris to his feet while you curl into a ball, crying softly. “God… this is all my fault.” You mumble, all you can hear are the voices laughing at you.


	8. Courage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized there are so many plot holes in this game. Also, sorry for making the reader so mentally unstable. Again. And for the rhetoric questions (I feel like a voice in your head would make you think about what you did instead of just telling you.)

00:58 – Six hours until dawn

“Josh – he-he killed him!” “What? What are you talking about???” “There’s a madman here on the mountain and he killed Josh!” “Cut right though him!!!” “I still can’t believe that actually happened.”

You overhear the conversation between Chris, Ashley, Matt and Emily, sitting away from them on a cold stone at the edge of the clearing just outside the shed. After you had fallen on the ground Ashley had tried to comfort you, but you had shooed her away. Chris had found Matt and Emily, and they were hanging close by to keep an eye on you. You were slowly inspecting the bruise on you lip, as it was swelling: you didn’t think Ashley could hit so hard…

_Aww, crying on yourself now, are you?_

“Shut up.” You hiss.

_So easy to cry over spilled milk. Too bad Josh chose to stick with you for all these years._

You bite your lips and try to lock the voice back in a little part of your mind, where you had secluded it for all the past years.

_Please, don’t make me laugh. You know that without a doc helping you with me you are just as helpless and broken as Josh was._

“Why are you making this to me?”

_Real question is: why are you making this to yourself? But let’s keep that for another time._

“…”

_You want to avenge Josh, right? I could help you with that. But you know how this works._

You shiver thinking what it will ask you this time.

_A favor for a favor, dear (y/n)._

1:02

“She’s so upset.” Chris commented while looking at you from the distance. “Who wouldn’t be?” Ashley scooted closer to him. “You know how she and Josh were. I can’t even imagine what she’s feeling right now.” She said while slipping her hand into Chris’s and giving it a light squeeze, him looking down at his hand, acknowledging the sweetness of that simple gesture. “She must feel so lonely without anyone at her side.” She dried her last tears on the end of her sleeve and let go of his hand, as she saw you approaching them.  
She inhaled sharply when she saw blood dripping from you left hand, but she shushed herself as you seemed to need to speak with them.  
“Have you decided what to do?” you mutter, a firm expression on your face; Matt turns from Emily and steps closer to you: “We want to look for help – maybe we could find something at the cable car station.” You nod knowingly, exchanging a glance with Emily whom, for once, was keeping silent, afraid she’ll aggravate your situation if she was like… well, herself. Ashley looks down before speaking “We should check on Sam. She could still be…” “It’s probable.” You cut her off. “I saw footprints getting away from the shed in the opposite direction from the lodge. I think that was the psycho’s doing. You and Chris should check the lodge, while I’ll be heading that way.” You point your finger toward an indistinct point in the middle of the woods. “Bob once told me he kept a stash with some weapons in it, just in case. It shouldn’t be that far from the lodge: once I retrieve something to defend ourselves with, I’ll reach you and put an end to this nightmare.”  
Chris’ jaw had almost dropped after hearing you make such a reasonable and logic assertion, looking cynically cold while doing it: after you turning feral on him, he didn’t know how and if he would have been able to reason with you. Ashley shook her head lightly “Are you sure you can make it? Maybe Chris could help you out.” “It’s not necessary. Besides, you have greater chances of meeting the psycho. You’ll need all the help you can get. I just need to go have some weapon shopping, that’s all.” You smile lightly, trying to lighten the mood. “So, do we all agree?” the others mumbled an indistinct “Yes.”

You just salute them with a nod and start walking towards the stash. You had a weird feeling in your chest; maybe because you had just told them a lie, though it wasn’t that far from the truth: now that you thought about it, Josh had once brought you to the stash, you weren’t told by his father as you had told them.  
You shrugged and took a deep breath: that’s what you gained when you let the voice control you. It always got what it wanted, and in the best way possible. Too bad it wanted you dead at times.

1:31

The path had got quite impervious and you had stumbled more than once on the roots of the trees, grunting as you slowly paced towards your goal.  
You chuckled at the thought of Chris walking beside you right now: he would have just slowed you down, though you knew why the voice had bid you to let no one follow you; if you were the only one with a weapon, you were the only one allowed to make the rules, thus being able to kill the psycho without anyone being in the position to question you.  
You don’t notice a root sticking out as it was covered in snow and trip on it, falling on the ground: you fall face first into the snow, feeling the voice scowl at you. When you stand up again, you realize you don’t know where you are, even if before it looked all so clear.

_Feeling a little lost?_

“W-what did you do??”

_You weren’t really thinking that little scratch would have satisfied me for the whole trip, were you?_

You glance at your bloodied hand: you could still see the marks left by your teeth on the flesh at the base of your thumb, scratches covering your wrist. You try to look around yourself, but it’s useless: you just don’t know where to go, everything looks the same.  
You scan an old tree, its cortex cracked and falling apart. You reach for a big chunk of it and tear it away with trembling fingers. You take a deep breath and roll up your sleeve, staring at your immaculate forearm – save for the faded scar that traced the length of it – and bring the cortex closer to it, grazing lightly on your skin. The line you had just traced reddened quickly, but you knew you had to do more to sate the voices. You keep scratching it until blood smears your sleeve.

_Aaah. That’s better._

At that moment, you let go of the cortex and look up, recognizing a crooked tree bending towards a small deer path. You head towards it and keep walking into the woods, strange noises surrounding you as you walk near the edge of the forest, where the rocky wall started; some of them were high pitched whistles, others low growls. You could swear you had heard a deer exhaling a horrified groan as something plated it, and then all fell silent again. Too silent. You stop and quietly listen to the forest, waiting for something else to happen: where were the birds, or the deer? You had never listened to anything making such strange noises, but as you tried to investigate, the voices made you focus again.

_We don’t have time for this._

The voices make you snap out of your thoughts and you walk inside the little cave in which you knew were stocked a couple of weapons: you lower your head while entering it and take out your lighter to make sure you saw where you were walking.  
You keep venturing deeper into the cave, hearing strange noises that seem to be following you. You reach the alcove where the secret stash was and cautiously plunge your hand into it, expecting to feel the texture of a sack brushing against your fingertips; instead, you feel your fingers touching the cold and wet surface of the cavern. Startled, you try to push your hand even deeper inside of it, but you find nothing at all.

_I…I don’t understand. This shouldn’t be happening._

You try to think about something else that might have helped you in this situation: clearly someone had taken the guns, you were more than sure that they should have been here. You think for a second that the voices might have lied to you, but they seemed to hate the psycho just as much as you did, so it seemed improbable. If the psycho was the one to take them, you were even more screwed than what you first thought.  
You spot someone staring at you in the distance, and immediately step towards him. “Ehi!” he seems to gesture you to keep quiet by putting his index on his lips and lifting his other palm motioning you to calm down, but you keep moving forward “What are you doing here?!” his movements become frantic as you keep shouting. You don’t understand why until you hear a ferocious growl coming from behind you, echoing in the cavern. You turn around to see what’s coming, seeing nothing in the darkness but distinctly hearing the clicking of something on the rock walls – like the claws of a cat on a wooden pavement, but much more loud. Your fight-or-flee instinct kicks in and you turn around to see the man had disappeared. You start running in the opposite direction of the growl, avoiding all the rocks on your way and paying attention to the unpredictable turns taken by the path. You turn and see the man from before at the end of a short corridor, another pathway on your right. “Move!” he orders and you jump into the new path before hearing a horrible screech and heat washing over your shoulders, the light produced by the fire twisting your own shadow in front of you.

You keep running down the cave but you soon realize that the thing – whatever it is - was still after you: you glance back and then turn your head to see where you were running, your eyes widening; the cave stopped and the rocky ground finished in… nothing. The cave continued downwards, but you weren’t sure you would have survived the fall. Hell, you didn’t even know if there was something underneath to stop you if you decided to jump.  
You hear the thing growling just behind you, and when you reach the edge of the rocks you hear it taking a longer step, maybe jumping: you duck just in time, feeling its claws grazing your left cheek, before looking at it falling right into the void. You couldn’t stop yourself immediately though: you roll on the cold pavement and slip over the edge, your right hand digging its nails into the rocks to prevent you from falling. You look down and see nothing but darkness, before throwing your left hand near your right one and pulling you up slowly, wheezing, sprawled on the cold floor of the cavern. You look up the way you came and see the man looking down at you. You feel shivers running down your limbs as he takes off his scarf and pulls up his goggles, scanning you from head to toe.

1:56

“Not a nice place to find yourself in, kid!” the man whispers to you, while you slowly stand up and take a deep breath. He motions you to get near him and you look at him suspiciously; “I’m not gonna bite, I promise.” He offers you a hand and you shiver when a guttural growl echoes through the cave, coming from the bottom of the pitch black fall right behind you “That, instead, will chop your head off. Now, what do you choose?” you quickly pace towards the stranger, grasping his hand and letting him pull you away.  
You follow him through the cave, the voice in your head protesting sharply as you just try to ignore it – without being really able to stop it, though.


	9. Abrupt Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The stranger. Man, I love this guy. (remember to read his parts with that dreadful accent :3)

2:01 – Five hours until dawn

You take deep breaths while following the stranger: he had let go of your hand but he was still keeping an eye on you, possibly making sure you weren’t up to anything stupid that might have got yourself killed.  
You pace in complete silence, but you want to know more: you have so many questions in mind you don’t even know where to begin with. “What was that thing?” you manage to whisper. “Not here, kid.” He bluntly replies you, but you can see his reasons and just keep quiet.  
The two of you reach a wooden door and he unlocks it, motioning you to get inside and locking the door back once within. “I can’t believe you kids were stupid enough to get back here.” You widen your eyes and shake your head, not understanding. He finally turns to you “I must say I have misjudged you – after you started yelling I thought you were going to be the perfect bait for the wendigo.” You narrow your eyes, frowning “The… what?”

Too many information in too little time. You had heard about wendigoes, sure, but mainly in legends and b-series movies. What had it to do with you?  
“The thing that just tried to chop your head off.” You snicker at him and shake your head, closing your eyes while doing so “Listen, old man, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve had one hell of a night.” You feel your jaw clenching, but keep talking “I’m not in the mood for your fairy tales.” “That ‘fairy tale’ looked pretty real to me.” He points at your cheek and you brush it with the back of your hand, looking at the blood now staining your skin.  
He’s moving again before you can even glance up at him: you keep following him, striding to reach his side. “So what are you exactly? A shaman? A prophet? Someone really pissed with those things who likes barbeque far too much?” “I’m a hunter, lad, and you’d better watch your tongue!”  
You scoff quietly, earning a death glare from the man “Why did you save me?” “Because I didn’t know you had such a mouth!” he turns to you “Keep. Quiet.” You frown again and lower your voice “Aren’t we in a safer part of the cave??” “Yes, but with your constant blabbing I can’t hear myself think!”  
You pout at him but do as he says, for the moment.

_Strange little man. We shouldn’t trust him._

“When did you and I become a ‘we’?”

_Darling, your question is answering itself._

You just shake your head, exhaling deeply and pinching the bridge of your nose: that night seemed to have become endless. You keep following the man inside the caves, reaching a sort of campsite: you see an open space behind some grids with tables covered in maps, photos, guns and any kind of trinket. Lots of plumes and dream catchers too.

“So… you live here?” he opens the grid door and gets in “Sometimes.” He gazes at you again, clearly displeased you had started this ‘talking thing’ again. You get in and look around the place once more, faking a wide smile “Lovely.” He sighs and turns around, looking for something in a corner of the room. You step closer to the aforementioned table and take a look at the things there, grabbing a little wooden miniature of a bird with an arrow in its claws and turning it in your fingers. You don’t notice him approaching you again, grabbing the trinket out of your hands “Stop snooping around!” he exclaims putting the thing back to its place.  
”I take you didn’t come into this cavern by chance.” He groans. You see he’s grasping a shotgun in his other hand. “That’s the Washington’s-“ “I know, I know: that naive man left them there and I took the chance. It’s not like he was putting them to good use anyway.” You would protest if he wasn’t handing it to you. “I could use a hand to get out of here.” He explains.  
Your eyes look at the shotgun and you grasp it lightly, looking back at him “This is not some kind of investiture, right? I won’t become your apprentice or anything?” he just looks at you in the eyes, exhales deeply, and then turns around, scratching his face “And I’m already regretting this…”  
You just smirk and weight the weapon in your hands. “So, how do I call you?” “No need for names, kid.” “Old man? No, that’s too trivial. Pyromaniac? Well, this actually suits you.” You say tilting your head. “Or I could call you Freddie!” you hear him sigh deeply, even from the other end of the room “Jack. Call me Jack.”

2:19

 _Jack_ was sitting near the table in the middle of the room, putting some more fuel in his flamethrower, while you were just looking around his desk. You find a little journal and start turning the pages, finding everything you didn’t want to know about wendigoes. The last entry was about twenty-five years ago.  
“So this is your ‘family thing’? Hunting down monsters?” “Didn’t I just tell you to-“ “Yeah, yeah, no snooping around, sure.” He sighs again, for the umpteenth time in the last ten minutes. You had never realized how frustrating you could be if you weren’t in the mood.  
“Do you know how to shoot, kiddo?” he asks out of nowhere “Sure.” You reply innocently, but he snickers “I doubt that.” And he was wrong to do so: your mother had taught you how to shoot the first time you moved into a big city; beside, Bob Washington had taken a liking on you because of it: not many girls could shoot at your age. Instead of complaining with Jack, you step nearby a bullet case and load the revolver he had given you, without breaking eye contact with him. He sarcastically claps at you “Congratulations, you know how to load a goddamn gun!” you narrow your eyes and look at something far away, eyeing a vase doing just right for you. You raise the gun with your right hand and aim at it, pulling the trigger: the vase is still intact, but the wooden wall behind it spits splinters and dust as the bullet gets stuck in it.  
You lower the gun and bite your lips, silence filling the room. After a couple of seconds you turn to Jack “It wasn’t _that_ far!” he just laughs, shaking his head. “It’s not like you would be able to kill a wendigo with it _even if_ you actually aimed right.” “You mean those things are bulletproof???” He nods, finding your startled expression way too amusing. “Yep. You can kill them just with fire, as far as I know – and you’d still need _lots_ of it.”

“Doesn’t matter.” You say, biting your inner cheeks. “We’ll wait until morning in a safe place, then we’ll figure out what to do about the wendigos.” You glance at the shiny revolver “They aren’t the reason I needed guns anyway.” “Aye. I saw what happened to you and your friends. Too bad the Washington lad lost it.” “W-what? What do you mean??” “Saw him running around to prepare everything for the whole morning. Scared you off your pants, hasn’t he?” “N-no. You may have seen the psycho. But not Joshua.” “I know what I saw.” “Then describe him.” “I don’t know… two arms, two legs, looking excited as a little teenager at her first prom...” “Yeah, you just described _any person in the whole friggin’ world.”_  
You take a moment to think. “Look, J-josh…” you sniff remembering his mauled body. “He came here this afternoon, he texted me about it, okay? He... he’s dead.” “He’s not, I tell ya-“

_Bullshit._

”I SAID HE’S DEAD!” Jack looks up at you for a second “I didn’t mean to offend ya-“ “Stop talking then.”

2:33

“It was about time we started moving.” You snap at him. You hadn’t been talking for a while, still pissed at what he had told you.  
You knew what you had seen. _Josh was fucking dead._ And you were about to deal with the whole situation.  
“Kiddo.” You have barely the time to turn and look at him “Catch.” he throws something at you: you catch it with both your hands and look down at it, discovering it was the wooden miniature you had been looking at before. You look up at him “What does it mean?” “It’s a protection. Against evil spirits.” He says before putting his backpack on. You stand up and follow him, letting the tiny miniature slip into the inner pocket of your coat.

You walk around the mines in silence, slowly making your way upwards: he’s not the talker type and you absolutely don’t want to say another word to him. Suddenly, a screech comes from the heart of the mines: you two exchange a glance before pacing faster – and quieter – towards the exit. You were climbing up a set of stairs when you heard the screech again. “It’s closer.” You murmur. His words are muffled by the scarf, but you get it: move on. You are pacing down another mine shaft when you hear a growl coming from your left: one of the things is charging you and you just feel Jack pushing you out of the way before standing in your place and using his flamethrower “Go, go!” you start running towards the light at the end of the cave when the silhouette of a wendigo stands in your way: you immediately run into a side cave, using the shotgun on the infinite set of claws popping out of the walls, but a couple of hands still manage to scratch your head and arms badly. You ignore the pain and keep running until someone yanks you behind a wooden wall, putting a hand on your mouth: when you look up, Jack is forming a sentence on his lips.

‘Don’t move’.  
The wendigo scans the environment, looking for you, but he quickly jumps away detecting no movement. You sigh and wait for Jack to look at both sides of the cave and giving you the okay before moving out of your hiding spot. You walk up another mine shaft, but as you start approaching the entrance another wendigo silently creeps behind you. Jack notices it too late but you’re able to use the shotgun on it and buy you some precious time: it was the biggest one you had seen so far, and even in the dark you could see those two crystal eyes glaring at you. You run towards the cave entrance when you hear something rumble behind you: the wendigo had broken one of the supports of the cave ceiling and everything was crumbling down; you sprint towards the entrance, Jack’s yells filling your ears as you make it out of the cave just in time. You had fallen on the snow, spread on the ground catching your breath: you glance back at the debris, hoping Jack had made it out of there somehow. Even though you hadn’t known him for long, you were sure he had survived worse.

You examine your wounds as you walk back towards the forest: your left cheek collected even more scratches than before, but this time they were deeper and ran from the bottom of your cheekbone to the top of your eyelid, grazing lightly your eyebrow; your arms, back and collarbones were covered in bruises and light scratches as your coat had protected you a little bit;

_Is this Christmas? If you wanted to bleed some more, you just had to ask…_

You shake your head at the comment and realize you had also hurt your ankle, probably while running out of the mine. It’s hurting badly, so you decide to take a break and find a bole laying on the ground where you can sit on; you bring your leg closer to your chest and inspect your foot, but you can tell immediately you haven’t sprained your ankle: you put a little popsicle on it anyway, hoping it won’t swell. Yet as you lean on your knee to reach your foot you feel something brushing against your chest: you open your coat and brush your fingertips lightly on the fabric on Josh’s shirt, fighting back the tears, looking into the side pocket.

You take out of it a pill tablet with different pills still into the aluminum: you take a while to read what’s written on it because of the darkness of the forest but you finally manage to understand you had in your hands a tablet of sleeping pills.  
‘Mh. Strange.’ You tell yourself. Josh didn’t take sleeping pills. He always told you they had no effect on him, that’s the main reason why you used to stay up until morning watching films with him. You hear the voice sing-song in your head:

_But most importantly, he didn’t take them because of the drug-drug reaction…_

You widen your eyes: if he had given one to you somehow, you would-  
No. No, that’s just such a silly thought, he can’t- he just _can’t._

“Fuck.” You mutter as you stand back up, walking towards the shed.

2:54

“He can’t have done it. There’s no way Josh-“ you couldn’t even say out loud what was passing in your head: what if Jack _was_ right? What if he had done this to you?  
The psycho had never hurt you directly, none of you. He even stunned you with gas! He didn’t hurt anyone…apart from chopping Josh to death. But if he was the Psycho, then…?

You feel a headache clenching your brain, and you groan in frustration. You had to reach the shed to make sure.

2:58

You inhale sharply when you sight the shed in the distance: you should have run to the lodge, but you _needed_ to know. The door opens with a creak and you stride towards the panel that had once separated you from Ash and Joshua.

You blink the tears away.

_That MOTHERFUCKER._


	10. Hurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aka how Josh managed to piss off even your inner voices. Also, you momentarily turn into the Joker. [Wanna know how I got these scars?]

2:59 – Four hours until dawn

You get closer to inspect the body, still not believing it: Josh’s ‘corpse’ hasn’t got his head on anymore, but you can now see a large hole in the panel behind; ‘Large enough to stick a head in’ you bitterly remark to yourself. You touch the surface of the neck, clearly lacking any realistic detail such as a throat, or the spine bones: it was in fact made entirely of silicone.

You wished you could still mutter to yourself convincingly that this wasn’t happening, but it _was_ happening: Joshua had betrayed and played you all with his morbid game. He had to have planned it for months; he did this to you deliberately with the intent of hurting you all, and he had managed to still fake all of those ‘I love you’s in _your_ face.  
You feel your fingers tightening on the shotgun, as you turn around and stride towards the lodge;

Now you saw him for what he was: a sick, coward sadist. The voices agreed with you for once and spurred you on: all the things that had happened, all his little games… you can barely comprehend how blind you had been.

(“You’re so predictable, Washington.”)

**(“You’re so predictable. Did you really think I was this stupid?”)**

Maybe you could have even seen it earlier if you had just paid some more attention; you talked alike, thought alike, no wonder you had been able to escape from him and he had always found you inside the lodge.

(“I had plenty of time to organize the thing”)

 _He’d been playing with us all along and we haven’t even noticed._ , the voices chant to you.  
The thought made your heart shrink inside your chest.

**(“For what it matters, I’m sorry it has come to this.”)**

You stop and lean on a nearby tree, leaning yourself on your arm and your forehead on it: tears were streaming down your face and you couldn’t even see where you were going. You push yourself away from it and shake your head, blinking the tears away, and resume walking.

You suddenly remember the wine;

_Fuck. How could we be so stupid?!?_

The voices are anguished and enraged. That way he had given you the sleeping pill. 

(“Are you still taking your pills?”)

He had even made sure you had taken your antidepressants. Thus the drug-drug reaction that made you drool around the house like a mindless zombie: your blood pressure must have dropped, thus the cold and the headaches, while you felt like puking the entire time because your body was actually trying to dispose of the meds itself;  
You bite down your lips and spot the lodge in the distance, feeling your legs numbing as you stride towards it; you run up the stairs and walk into the secondary entrance: you make your way in the main hall and start descending the stairs, the shotgun still firm in your tight grip.

3:09

It takes you a while to find your way around the place: when you hear muffled screams in the distance, you know you’re headed in the right direction. You manage to find a secondary door and open it, storming down the corridors: you turn around a corner and see a door with a little window on top at the end of the aisle, the light coming from the new room up ahead illuminating Chris and Ashley. You didn’t buy the new buzzing saws not even for a second and so you made your way towards the new door pacing calmly, opening the shotgun and checking on the number of bullets remaining: only one. You check the revolver inside the back of your pants and close the shotgun, hearing it do its characteristic “cha-kla”.

When you reach the door you try to turn the doorknob, but you quickly realize the door is locked with a padlock. You raise your gaze and observe the scene as Chris shoots himself and all the lights switch off. Your hands reach for the padlock in the dark and you closely aim at it, shooting at it.  
The lights turn back on and you see Chris and Ash staring in your direction as you kick the door open.

“Joshua _fucking_ Washington!” you scream, your stomach shrinking and your limbs buzzing with all the adrenaline that was pumping into your circulatory system.  
The psycho makes his final entrance, and you almost roll your eyes as Chris tries to shoot him with the gun that _clearly_ didn’t kill him. You don’t even hear Josh’s reply as he takes off his mask, the usual smug grin playing on his face.

“J-Josh???” the others stare in disbelief, and you realize also Mike and Sam have entered the room.  
Josh looks at them all, spinning around the room, gloating. Telling crap about his sisters’ deaths. You’re still staying in the darker part of the room, the shadows enveloping you. 

“You think this is funny?!?” you manage to say: never before your voice had sounded so firm and ferocious. “Oh, (y/n).” he raises his arms in your direction. “You just _had_ to spoil my end, didn’t you?”  
God. You couldn’t _believe_ he was saying so after all the things he had done to you. You throw your shotgun on the floor and take the revolver from your jeans, but he’s not even looking at you. “B-but- you managed to get w-where my plan was going.” He turns to you, bowing slightly as he lowers his head down and opens his arms, still looking at you. “Bravo.”  
You slowly point the gun at him, the others flinching and silently gasping as you do so, while Josh just straightens and looks at you with a grin. “Come on, you think I didn’t replace all the guns around here with fake ones?” he tilts his head to the side “I d-d-don’t know how you managed to find one, though. Thought I had hidden them all.” You take your time to savor the moment, inhaling sharply through your nostrils before speaking again, taking away the safety catch as you do so “Did you also check your father’s stash?” the grin immediately disappears from his face as he straightens his head and looks at the gun with wide eyes “P-put the gun down, (y/n).” his eyes look for yours as you slowly pace towards him, out of the shadows, where everyone can see all the scratches running down your face, your bloodied hands and forearms and your tattered clothes. He opens his mouth in disbelief – just as the others were doing, you were almost sure you were seeing them at the edge of your eyes. You hear Mike murmuring “(y/n)… what happened to you?” you move your eyes to meet his, acknowledging him before turning your attention back to Josh.  
“Do you want to know how loud the voices are talking in my head right now?” you lick your lips and grin at him, your eyes wide open. “B-babe…I’m sorry b-but-“ he raises his palms towards you, protectively, taking a step back “I-I-I d-don’t have anything t-to do with this.” You snap your hand on his jumpsuit and push the gun on his neck, pulling him down so he’s kneeling in front of you “You _fucking_ messed with _my meds_ you _fucking bastard!”_ You hear Sam trying to step towards you, her hands raised in defense “(y-y/n), we can find a solution, none of us has to suffer ag-“ you push the gun tighter on Josh’s skin, staring at her with wide eyes slowly filling with tears. “Stay. Back.” You growl.  
She takes a step back and you turn your attention back to Josh. You take a pause before understanding what you wanted to tell him, a tear slowly falling down your cheek, the hand on your gun trembling lightly. “I-I loved you. I would have gladly given my life for you. To save you from that fucking saw-” You sob. “Y-you we-weren’t s-sup-posed to see that-“ “SHUT UP!” you take a deep breath, the tears were streaming down your face “You think that if I weren’t there it would be different?!? You betrayed us, Josh, you fucking betrayed us all!!” “Y-you did this to m-m-me- my sisters-“ “STOP SHIELDING YOURSELF BEHIND THEM, JOSH! THEY’RE. FUCKING. DEAD!” you yell pushing the gun on his cheek.

You straighten back up, a chorus singing and screeching in your head to shoot him, kill him and look down at his lifeless corpse. You aren’t able to stop yourself from pulling the trigger, but you still manage to aim at your right, shooting near the left side of his head, the bullet cracking the floor tiles.  
You let go of him as he screams in pain and covers his ears, the closeness of the shot had surely sent a whistle echoing through his skull. Your vision blurs with tears as you turn around and walk back the way you came, throwing the gun on the old wooden floor.

3:16

You walk until your sobs become so strong you feel like falling down – until you actually do: you fall on your knees and elbows and try to curl up into a ball again, never stopping crying. Your head was a mess: that’s the only thing you could perceive as darkness enveloped you, your thoughts too blurry and shaky to be called your own and the voices just screaming, shouting, screeching, giggling in the back of your mind. You lean on your knees and slowly wrap your head in your arms, letting out a desperate scream as your tears never stopped falling down on the pavement.

You barely hear footsteps behind you as you sob softly against the floor; a hand caresses your back and you just let it stroke you gently. “I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” You stutter in between sobs.  
“It’s alright, (y/n). We’ve got you now.” Sam’s voice. Dear, caring Sam.  
You find the strength to sit up after a little while, your crying fading a little and Sam’s hand never leaving your back. “I didn’t mean to frighten you. I didn’t mean to- fuck, what did I tell Josh…” your words echoed vaguely into your brain: those were the last things you would have ever wanted to tell him, but you felt so _angry_ and _scared_ and _upset_ it felt like the right thing to do at the moment. “I’m so mean. I don’t deserve you here- I don’t deserve you caring about me.” Sam keeps stroking your back. “Shhh, that’s completely false. You’re a good person, (y/n). You just found yourself in a really bad situation.” You are not wholly convinced, but you nod nonetheless. “Is there anything we can help you with to stop the, uhm, voices?” you know she doesn’t understand you. Thinks you’re crazy.  
You are, actually.  
You try to cut off the voices for a moment and you manage to mutter “My pills.” Sam keeps listening to you. “Inside my backpack. Little container. Don’t know if it will work.” You are finally looking up at Sam, and she gives you a reassuring smile. “They will.”

You hear footsteps coming from the hallway and Mike pops out of the corner, running towards you. “You two alright here?” you nod lightly “We were just talking.” Sam says with a little smile. She stands up and you immediately miss the warmth of her hand on your shoulder. They’re whispering, but you still hear them “What happened with Josh?” “I managed to tie him up. He’s asleep in the backroom.” “Asleep?” “I… ah-ehm… punched him.” Sam takes a deep breath “Mike!” “He killed Jessica, Sam. I know it.”

“U-unlikely.” You mutter. The two of them look down at you “He’s been around the lodge for the whole time. You were at the cabin. There are wendigos in the cabin, wendigos everywhere near the mine, mines everywhere in Blackwood Pines.” You chant quietly. Sam and Mike exchange a look with each other and then she tells him she’s going to fetch your pills, while he kneels beside you as Sam walks away.

“And what are these wendigos like?”


	11. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feelings! Also, Mike fluff.

3:20 – Four hours until dawn

You know he is just being condescending. By now you have learnt to recognise when people do that to you. Happened a lot of times when you were in therapy.  
But damn, you needed to stop listening to the voices shrieking, you needed somebody to talk to, someone that could actually listen to you.

“Skinny. Sharp. Mean.” You are still sitting on the floor, your legs bent at your sides, your hands on your lap, staring at the cracked wall in front of you. “Bloodlust. They bite. A lot.”  
You sniff again, you hadn’t stopped moving in what felt like hours and your body was aching for some rest. You kept your eyes wide open – both for the fear, and also to not let your tears fall down. You feel Mike’s fingers trailing up your chin and putting a lock behind your ear. You close your eyes, the tears fall down your cheeks.

Mike had always been your best buddy, since the first time you had met him: there was chemistry between the two of you, but you weren’t naïve enough to fall for him and he knew he couldn’t wrap you around his finger like he did with the others; you had helped make his crushes fall for him on several occasions, at times he even kissed you – that’s actually how you and Emily _met_ , you recall: the first thing she had ever told you was ‘bitch’ and then slapped you. What a charming personality did she have back then.  
You felt so guilty anytime Hannah talked to you about her crush on him: in her eyes, you were ‘living the dream’. Stupid fragile Hannah. You sigh again, feeling a wave of guilt gripping at your guts.

You had introduced Mike to her. You still remembered that night very well: one of Josh’s crazy Halloween parties, to which you were invited of course. It was your second year of high school – you had just come back from that year in another city with your mother, had just happened to realize what feelings you had been developing for Josh in the past three years, and just met the infamous Mike Monroe.  
He took an instant liking on you – you never really quite understood why. He was funny enough and he already knew Sam, so you hadn’t hesitated for a second before asking him if he wanted to join the party. You had to give him a tour of the house of course, and when you reached the bar you introduced him to the twins. You remember you had seen Hannah’s eyes glint in a strange way as she shook his hand. Damn you and the stupid thing that had made you bond so deeply with Mike.  
There was awkwardness between the two of you sometimes: you got… a little easy when you drank too much. That’s the beginning of a story that ended with you and him waking up next to each other on a tiny little couch, completely hungover but with your clothes still on, his face smeared with your lipstick.  
You had acted like nothing had happened, of course; he seemed to be cool with it too. Still, sometimes you caught him looking at you in a strange way…

And now he was caressing your cheek, brushing away the tears with his thumb. “Might have been a bear?” he asked softly, scanning the wounds on your face “N-no.” you stutter, more tears filling your eyes. He then looks down at your exposed wrist – the left one – and slowly picks it up, pulling the sleeve carefully up your arm. “What happened here?” “T-t-the voices…” you brush your face with the back of your other hand “T-t-they ma-ma-made me do it-t” He looks at you with a pitiful expression on his face, getting closer to you: an arm around you and his other hand cupping the back of your neck, pulling you into a hug. “(y/n)… I’m so sorry…” you bury your face in the crook of his neck, your fingers pinching lightly the fabric of his jacket. You slowly wind your arms around him as he pulls you closer.

3:25

You were sitting on the couch in the lodge’s main hall: Ashley had covered you with a warm blanket and had sat next to Chris while waiting for Sam to come back with your medicine. You are fiddling with what remained of your nails as you waited, trying to find the right words to apologize to them.

“C-Chris… Ashley…” their heads immediately snap to you, thinking you were in need of something “I-I’m sorry… for… before.” You turn to look at them “I am sorry I accused you… and hit you, and… I’m so stupid. Sorry. I’m so sorry for what happened.” “We understand, (y/n). It’s okay.” “Yeah, you weren’t yourself, dude. Let’s just forget about it.” It may have been the depression making you feel all these emotions amplified, but you were really touched by their comprehension and lowered your face, a couple of tears escaping again from your eyes. “T-thank you.” You hear Ashley going ‘awwww’ on you and you know that when this is over, you’re going to hate all of this, but when they stand up from the sofa and sit on the couch with you, one on each side, you know you wouldn’t give up on this for anything else in the world.  
You feel them embracing you and you just manage a little chuckle, mumbling “You’re the best.” “We’re a big family, (y/n). We look after each other. Like cats do.” “Ok, Chris: you’re out. Ashley: you’re still the best.” You and Ashley laugh as Chris tries to pout at you, saying that you’re so mean, when Sam walks into the hall and strides towards you. “Are these the pills?” you almost rip the little container out of her hands “I can get you some water if you…oh.” She mumbles pointing her thumb towards the kitchen, stopping midsentence as she sees you take a couple of pills and swallowing them dry without even batting an eye “Or you could swallow them whole. No problem.” You thank her as you push the little can into one of the pockets of your coat.

3:31

You had made your way on the upper floor and started looking through Josh’s stuff: you knew he still smoked and you really felt like a cigarette couldn’t hurt you right now. You had started looking around his room, which was a mess with clothes sprawled everywhere on the floor; you briefly wonder when he found the time to unleash this level of chaos on his room, before you finish looking around the surface of his desk and start opening the drawers, looking thoroughly. You give up, finding no nicotine inside the whole room and you grumble, discontented. You turn around and glance at the door: you close it, finding a jacket hanging from a hook on the other side; you fish inside the pockets and finally find a little carcinogenic pack. You go back to the walkway and open the door to the terrace, getting out in the refreshing air of the mountain. You fill your lungs with the racy mountain air before pulling a cigarette out of the pocket and the zippo, using your hand to shield the cigarette from the wind as you light it up. You hear footsteps coming from behind you and turn to see Mike pacing towards you. He gets by your side and looks down at you “Can I have one?” you pull the one you had already between your lips and offer it to him, which he gladly accepts – your hands brushing lightly as you pass it to him.

You light another cigarette and inhale deeply, nicotine stunning your brain for a couple of seconds as you exhale from your lips. “I didn’t know class president Monroe smoked.” You say grabbing the railing and looking at him. “He does sometimes.” He replies with a forced smile, looking at you.  
“So, how are you holding up after the meds?” he says tapping on the cigarette. “They don’t kick in so quickly. Luckily, I’m susceptible enough to suffer from a gigantic placebo effect minutes before the drugs start actually working.” You take a pause and look in the distance. “Makes them scared and run in the back of my mind.” “The… voices?” he asks hypothesizing. You take a deep drag from your cigarette “Look – I know it sounds crazy. It is. But I really hear them if I don’t take the goddamn pills.” You breathe out smoke as Mike responds you “I know – don’t get me wrong. I don’t think you’re faking it, I just…” he looks at you and lowers his gaze, breathing in deeply “It must feel horrible, being unable to stop them from telling you what to do.” “It is.”

You finish smoking in silence, occasionally gazing at each other before putting out your cigarettes and walking back inside.

3:40

You were back into the lodge, sitting on the couch: Sam had insisted on having a look at your wounds, saying you couldn’t go around looking like that – you could have got too easily an infection. You had taken off your coat and Josh’s sweater: you heard the girls gasp at how many cuts you had on your body. Sam and Ashley were inspecting the deep scratches, when you wonder where Chris had gone.  
“He’s with Mike. They’re taking Josh to the shed.” You catch your breath as Sam tells you this. You move suddenly your arms out of their grips “They can’t leave him there! There are wendigos outside!” Ashley grabs your hand and caresses it, trying to calm you down “There’s no monster out there, (y/n).” you shake your head: they weren’t listening to you. “I didn’t _imagine_ it, I’m sure!” Sam adds her voice to the discussion “(y/n), I hate being this blunt to you, but are you sure it wasn’t just an hallucination?” you turn to her with wide eyes “Do these scratches look like an hallucination to you??” “I’m- I’m not saying that! But – maybe – they weren’t monsters. That’s all.” You stand up and cross your arms on your chest, your forearms half bandaged. You pace around a little circle, turning back to them. “If they weren’t wendigos, then what did this to me?” “I don’t know… there’re bears, wolves… deer…” you scoff at her. “Yeah. A fucking deer tried to rip my head off.” Sam fell silent at your comment, and Ashley tried to make you reason “We’re sorry, but we just don’t get what’s going on.” You felt your insides twist at how pitiful her voice sounded. “No, look… I’m sorry I snapped… again. It’s been a long night. Maybe… maybe you’re right.” You sit back between them and hand them your arms, and they continue as nothing happened. “Though Jack was right about Josh…” you mumble to yourself.

“Who’s Jack?” you look up to Ashley, a curious frown on her face “I met him in the caves. He had taken Bob’s weapons from his secret stash, had a secret camp down there…” you catch also Sam’s attention who stops wrapping the bandage and looks up to you. “He told me about the wendigos. Had a flamethrower, too. He helped me out of the cave, but he… he got trapped inside. One of those things had broken the supports.” You sniff lightly, hoping he was still alive. You hadn’t seen his corpse, after all.  
Sam and Ash exchange worried glances with each other, but don’t say anything.  
“Look, I know there aren’t… creepy things crawling around the place, but can I go to the shed later? They might feel lonely after a while, and I’m afraid Chris will fall asleep while making guard.” The other two chuckle at the image, and they tell you it’s okay if you feel up to.


	12. Tender

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The poor little psychotic cinnamon roll is still tied up in the shed. Also, smooching with Mike occurs.

3:55 – three hours until dawn

You’re pacing slowly towards the shed, the cold gripping at your bones: Ashley and Sam did one hell of a job with your medication and you felt all cozy – and still a little itchy – inside your new bandages. You easily walk up the path – you all had stepped on it so many times there was a track you could follow without getting your boots inside the snow. On your way to the shed you took a glimpse of a shadow walking slowly down the path: as you got near it you recognize him as Chris and motion him to wait for you to reach him in the middle of the snow.  
He was frowning, looking like he was deeply thinking about something.

“Ehi.” You greet him cheerily “Ehi. Nice to see you back in the realm of the living.” You make a disgruntled noise. “Mmh, you know how it is for us weirdos: we have to come back to life from time to time.”  
You stop joking and look down at him, your face serious as you meet his eyes. “Are you holding up?” he looks in the distance, avoiding your gaze “I’m… trying. I can’t believe this night just… happened.” “You tell me.” He rubs the back of his neck, and you feel like giving him a hug; he accepts it gladly and keeps you close to him. “I’m sorry all of this happened. I was his girlfriend, I should have noticed earlier.” “None of us knew. Don’t blame yourself, you did what you could.” You don’t really believe him, but you let go of him and look down. “Mike is back at the shed… with… Josh?” “Y-yeah. We decided to split. Have some rest.” You just nod, and then Chris finally notices you were carrying a little box. “What’s that?” you look down at it and back to him “First aid. I noticed… well, Mike hasn’t got-“ “Fingers. Yeah, I saw it too, but bringing up the subject seemed… impolite.” “I just want to make sure he’s fine. He’s been through… a lot.” “As we all did this night.” You nod, but you knew Mike had had it far worse than you: he saw someone die for real, while Josh just faked it.

You say goodbye to Chris and head to the shed, lifting your knees up so you don’t drench your jeans with snow, the first aid box clunking at your side. When you reach the clearing you immediately spot Mike just outside of the doors, looking up at the sky. “Hey, Mr. President!” he looks up at you, a smile tilting the corners of his mouth upwards “What are you doing here?” You approach him, shrugging “Thought you might use some company.” You say smiling. You lean on your side and snoop behind Mike, inside the doors. “How’s Josh doing?” you see him stiffen as you do so. “He’s – passed out.” You open the door and see Josh’s unconscious body, bound to the wooden pillar, his face bruised in different spots. “Did you punch him again?” you state not even angry, but mostly tired. “What? No!” Mike steps beside you “Chris… he snapped. He bet Josh unconscious with a piece of wood!” you look at him with wide eyes “Chris? The adorable blonde powerpuff with glasses I just saw walking back to the lodge?” Mike nods with a little smile on his face “That one.” You shake lightly your head. “Can’t blame him. I was about to do much worse.” Mike looks at your worried expression and playfully pushes your arm “Hey, what about we get out of here and try to relax for the rest of the night?” You nod lightly and take a deep breath, making your way out of the doors, Mike following you suit.

You turn around and face him, walking backwards. “Look, I brought the first aid, in case you wanted to…” you just motion at his mutilated hand and he follows your gaze. “I could have a look at it if you want me to.” He raises his hand, as if he had forgotten about his missing fingers. “Oh. Yeah, I’d appreciate that.”  
Your lips form a little smile as you spot a bole on which the two of you could sit and watch that Josh didn’t do anything stupid; you walk to it and sit, patting the spot just next to you. Mike sits down and takes a little silver flask out of the inner pocket of his jacket while you open the box and look for the bandages. “And where does that come from?” you ask, your eyebrows tilted as he takes a sip “I found it in the jacket.” “You ‘found it’??” you then realize you had never seen this jacket on him, and make a face at him. “I…stole it.” You scoff at him and shake your head, a smile playing on your lips “It’s not like they were using it anyway!” he offers you the flask and you take a little sip, the alcohol burning down your throat _“Son of a motherless Judas priest!”_ you swear as you cough a little bit, Mike laughing and patting your back. You return the flask and he takes another sip, offering you his damaged hand. You peel gently off the dirty bandage and bite down at your lips as you see the bones sticking out of his stumps. “This is gonna hurt a little.” He just nods at you and takes another sip, squeezing his eyes shut between the pain in his hand and the burning down his throat; you sterilize it and apply a fresh bandage, moving cautiously and delicately so not to hurt him.

4:07

“Done and done.” Mike looks down at his hand, smiling “Thank you.” “Tch, don’t mention it.” You reply returning the smile.  
He puts his arm around your shoulders and pulls you closer to him: you feel like that gesture is a little too intimate, but you both had a horrible night and instead of getting away with a joke you leant into him and rested your head on his shoulder. Minutes pass with the two of you just staying there, saying nothing, and looking at the snow fall. Mike was very warm, emanating heat like a little stove. You find yourself getting closer to him, your arm brushing against his back as your mind tries to warn you, but you shush your thoughts back easily also thanks to the medicine and the alcohol – which, you remind yourself, was a really bad idea drinking after taking your pills.  
“Thank you for being here for me, Mike.” You murmur. He looks down at you. “You’re kidding? You have stack around whenever I needed help. Comforting you is the least I can do.”  
He licks his lips and looks away from you “I hated seeing you like that before.” The hand resting on his lap clenches in a fist “I felt so powerless… I didn’t know how to help you.” He gazes back to you, his eyes shining ”I just wanted to say… I’m glad you’re back to yourself.” His hand caresses your knee as he leans into you “Me too.” You whisper, before closing the distance and let your lips meet in a soft and tender kiss. His hand slips up your thigh and he lifts your legs on top of his, bringing you in his lap. You feel his hands roaming gently your back and hips, afraid he’d hurt you if he stroked you harder. You let your fingers caress the sides of his head, feeling his hair a little bloody and dirty here and there, but still soft. You break the kiss as you lean your knee on the bole and move you other knee on the other side of Mike, straddling him as you feel his hands stroking your hips before pulling your waist closer to his chest and bringing you back down in his lap to kiss you again. His hands find the zip of your coat and he opens it, caressing your sides and sliding up, stopping just under your bra, his big hands covering your torso; he breaks the kiss and looks up at you, murmuring “I’ve been waiting so long for this.”

Your mind reminds you that it’s probably what he tells everyone – you had possibly heard him saying it even once or twice to his other girlfriends – but he seemed really honest while murmuring that to you. Either way, you didn’t give a damn at the moment since having someone so close to you was making you feel buzzy and happy again. He kisses your throat and leaves a trail of kisses down your chest, kissing down to your breasts. He then looks up at you and you lower to kiss him again, your tongues brushing against each other’s.

You could easily question him – not even half a day ago he had another girlfriend, who had possibly just died in some horrible and twisted way he didn’t want to talk about. This reminded you of something – of someone: Joshua did the same thing with Hannah and Beth.  
You try to silence the thoughts in your head and remain in that blissful state of complete ignorance towards the outer world, when an all-too-familiar screech echoes through the forest.

You two catch your breath and look in the direction where the sound had come. You quickly turn to him and whisper “What happened to Jess, Mike?” he looks up to you and then down, raising his arms, buying time “You really want to talk about this? Right now?” he says while gently stroking your hips, looking right in your eyes. You take his hands off of you and keep staring at him. He bites down on his lip and avoids your gaze one more time before speaking “Look, she – she died, there’s nothing-“ “Yes, but _how_ did she die?” he stares at you, lacking momentarily for words. You stand up from his lap and take a step back from him "You say Josh killed her, but… even if he’s done horrible things tonight he hasn’t physically hurt any of us directly. While you are missing two fingers, for Christ’s sake!” “I am also the one mainly responsible for his sisters’ disappearance!” he says while standing up and pointing his finger on his chest “He easily had all the time to organize everything up in the sanatorium to fuck with me!”

He was avoiding your question. “Mike. How did Jessica die?” you feel him breaking down a little, but he sniffs and looks back at you “Why are you still defending him? He’s batshit crazy, (y/n )! He doesn’t deserve to be with someone like you!”

_I know._

“This is not about me, Mike. Please.” He weeps a little, and you close the distance between you, taking his hands between yours “What happened?”  
He muffles a sob, pressing his lips in a thin line “Something took her. From the cabin.” He looks down “I-I wasn’t able to reach her in time. I found this mine shaft, and when I got closer… something… dropped Jessica. She was covered in bruises, scratches…” he sobs loudly “Something had ripped her jaw away.” You look at him during the whole story, and then hug him as he sobs quietly on your shoulder. “Oh God…” you murmur.

You break the hug to look at him once more “Mike? Mike! I need to know one more thing, please!” you take him by his forearms and squeeze gently, trying to comfort him and give him some courage “What were these scratches like?” he sobs and doesn’t reply, but he’s looking at you “Were they like mine?” he nods and brushes his eyes with the back of his hand.

_Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck._

You take a step back, fully realizing what you already knew: you weren’t making it up. There were monsters on top of this mountain.  
“(y/n)? You okay?” you were probably looking paler than usual. You are about to explain him everything when you two hear a scream, which you recognize as Emily’s.  
Mike looks you in the eyes “Go. Get to the lodge, I’ll reach you in a minute.” He doesn’t question you as you sprint back to the shed.

You enter inside and immediately close the door behind you, barricading it with a wooden girder, blocking the doors. You feel movement behind you and snap around, feeling your nerves tense as cords.  


“Hi (y/n).”


	13. Chase

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember the frozen lake I have never told you about? Yeah, me neither! (went completely ex machina here. Sorry.) Also, I suck at action sequences. Be patient with me, it’ll all be over soon.

4:19 – Three hours until dawn

You look in silence as Josh is staring up at you: one of his cheeks was swollen and he had another bruise on his forehead. He stared at you with his beautiful green eyes, while you just scanned him up and down, trying to detect any other wounds.

You hear another screech coming from outside and falter, remembering why you were here. “We have to go.” You say as you try to step towards him, failing at it; he was the psycho that had thrown you into that nightmare: you hadn’t forgotten yet. Your eyes lock with each other and you find yourself unable to speak, your words dying in your throat. What could you tell him? That it was fine? That everything would have been ok?  
No, nothing would be fucking okay: you would be probably forced into therapy again, he risked being sent to ECT, you would have probably been apart for months and possibly you would never see each other again. He had screwed everything up, and he looked like he knew it.  
You take a deep breath and force yourself to get behind him: you start examining the knots, Josh following you with his gaze. After a moment of silence, he speaks: “I’m-m sorry for what happened.” You look at him and then get back to the knots, making clear you don’t want to talk to him. He speaks louder and raises his head, trying to look at you above his shoulder “(Y/N), I’m sorry, ok? But THEY- you saw them! They barely realize what they’ve done to my sisters! I HAD TO!” you finally snap at that comment “No, Josh: you didn’t have to do fucking anything. You decided you should have done this, without speaking to anyone – not your parents, your friends – not even _to me._ ”. You take a deep breath as you realize you don’t know how to free him, and you start looking for something sharp to cut the ropes. “You lied to us – tortured us! You think we’ll be able to trust you, ever again?” you turn to him and he looks down “…I didn’t want this to happen.” You feel your stomach shrinking at the sight, but you resist the temptation of caressing his cheek. “I didn’t want you to hate me.” You knew you loved him, and it hurt like hell hearing him say so. It’s not like the feelings you felt for him had just disappeared in thin air: you try to mediate, and manage to murmur “I don’t hate you, Joshua.”

He sniffs, raising his head to look at you again, biting his lip while weeping “I saw you and Mike.” You feel yourself stiffening, your chest numbing again. “A-and I know you have all the reasons t-to d-despise m-me. But (y/n),” you feel tears in your eyes, but you quickly blink them away “I-I wasn’t lying to you. You _are_ the best t-thing I’ve got. I love you, and… I don’t know what I’ll do without you.” He sobs, bowing again, his restraints the only thing keeping him from falling on the ground. “J-Josh…” you sigh.

Screw your pride. Screw your pain. Screw even Mike, and the fucking voices inside your fucking head: he needed you now. You can be angry with him when this is all over – when you two will be hospitalized. For now, you let yourself get closer to him and caress his hair, letting him lean his face on your belly, crying softly against you. “Shh. I’m not leaving you, Josh. I’m not going anywhere without you.” You keep stroking his hair until he stops sobbing: you caress his cheek as he rests his head against you, his eyes closed.

“T-thank you.” He manages to stutter before you caress his cheek one last time and leave him to look around the place for something sharp. You easily find a broken buzz saw lying in a corner: he must have made some tests before… his show. You exhale deeply, trying to remain calm: ‘when this will be over…’ you promise yourself as you go back to him and start moving the blade to cut the ropes. You hear Josh whimper and you stop “Did I hurt you?” not hearing an answer, you move in front of him, seeing him with his eyes shut, gritting his teeth, facing the floor. “Josh?” you caress him, noting that tears are still falling down his cheeks. “They’re looking at us.” He says pleadingly. You brush the tears away “Who’s looking at us?” he seems to have zoned out again: he opens his eyes, but looks anywhere but where you are. He’s looking at his side with an horrified expression when you cup his cheek and make him look at you. “Josh. Who do you see?” “B-Beth…Hannah…I’m sorry…” he was hallucinating again. How was that possible? He took so many drugs-

You widen your eyes, hoping to be wrong, but as you list the symptoms in your head it all looks clearer. You cup his face between your hands and force him to look at you. “Josh… buddy, listen to me:” he’s looking at you at least; you’re not sure whether he’s actually _seeing_ you though. “When did you get your pills last time?” He seems to think about it. When you’re about to repeat your question he mumbles “At 16. I think.”

More than twelve hours without phenelzine. No wonder he was breaking apart. “Where are your pills, Josh? How do I get you out of this situation??” he shakes his head, at first you thought to an hallucination but then he looks at you. “Don’t have them.” “What!?”

At that moment, something starts banging on the door, and you look above your shoulder, seeing the door trembling down the force of the bangs. “We don’t have time. No, no no no, no time.” You say as you grip the saw and continue to cut the ropes.

4:27

You finally manage to cut them as the banging stops. Josh stays still, shivering, as you slowly stand up and look at the door. You take him by his hand and help him to his feet, whispering to be quiet. You let go of his hand as you cautiously approach the door, putting your ear on it, listening to the outside; suddenly, the doors bang again, stronger than before, and you fall back on the ground, kicking to get away from them. Then you hear yells from outside, fire shining through the windows.

Everything falls quiet. Then, someone knocks on the door. “Anybody still alive?” you could recognize that horrible accent among a million “Old Man!” you exclaim, while he grumbles on the other side of the door. “Kiddo? What the hell are you doing in here?!?” you cup your mouth in your hands “Thank God you’re alive! I had left you for dead!” you open the doors: Jack is standing in front of you, while you can see Chris just behind him with a confused expression on his face “Y-You know each other?” “Long story.” You feel Josh standing beside you and you take his hand.  
“See, ‘t was the Washington lad! What did I tell ye?” he says, pointing at his jumpsuit “Yeah, sorry. You were right.” You look down, you want anything but to talk about the psycho right now.  
“Let’s get you out of here before more wendigos come.” You nod silently, walking out of the shed. “It’s not like you have a spare weapon or something?” you ask as you pass in front of him “Do I look like a damn vending machine to you?” “Yeah, yeah, sorry alright! I had to ask.”

You took Josh’s hand and squeeze it to bring him back to reality as he’s talking to himself again. “It’s gonna be fine, ok?” you say, breaking your previous promise not to say crap like that. He nods at you and you two keep walking hand in hand behind Chris, Jack closing the group.  
Suddenly, another shriek comes from your right: it’s the wendigo from before. It’s sitting on the branch of a tree, its blue eyes glaring directly at you. It suddenly jumps down from it and circles around the group: you see it growling and trying to jump at you when Jack uses the flamethrower on it. “Run!” he yells at you, before rejoining the group. You yank Josh with you, afraid he’ll get left behind if you don’t pay close attention to him. The wendigo jumps in front of you and when Jack is about to use the flamethrower again it dodges and chops off his head. You scream when he falls to his knees, his head rolling towards your feet, his eyes staring up at you. Luckily Chris shoots the wendigo before it can attack again and you are pulled away by Josh, who is running close behind him. The wendigo circles you again and tries to attack from in front of you, but Chris is quick enough to shoot it again;  
this time the Wendigo doesn’t fall to the side though; instead, it digs its claws in the ground as it is pushed behind from the force of the shot and when it stops, it growls at you. You look at it and start walking backwards, while he stands up and shrieks. Before Chris can shoot it another time it punches him out of the way, never breaking eye contact with you and making Chris fly in the middle of a bush at the side of the path.

Josh is squeezing tightly your hand, mumbling incomprehensible things to himself. You keep walking away from it, until you stumble on Jack’s corpse – and you have an idea: you leave Josh’s hand and quickly take off Jack’s flamethrower from his headless corpse. The wendigo jumps to you but you duck to the side, letting it roll on the snow behind you. It screeches looking back at you as you quickly unstrap the gas containers.

“No! Get away from her!”

The thing’s head snaps to Josh and in the blink of an eye it gets to him and throws him against a tree, you see him landing on the ground, another bruise quickly forming on his forehead.  
“Josh! Wake up!” he just groans as he tries to look around himself. The thing was staring at Josh, who was barely able to look back at it, his head visibly bleeding. You see it raise him from the collar of his shirt and shriek near his face.

_Oh, hell no this is not happening._

“Hey!” it stares at you and screeches “Yeah, you bitch! Josh is mine! Take your fucking claws off him!!” You don’t know if it could actually understand what you were saying, but it drops Josh nonetheless. It stands up and growls, showing its teeth to you. When it’s close enough, you click the trigger and flames wash over its body: it tries to shield it with its claws, but then dodges and hides in the trees.

You had no choice: you had to lure it away from Josh, hoping he would regain consciousness in the meantime and get back to the lodge. With him in this state, you risked both your lives. “I’m sorry.” You murmur, before yelling at the thing and start running in the middle of the woods.  
You could hear it groaning and jumping behind you, following you closely and getting nearer and nearer.

4:41

You see the frozen lake in between the trees: you try to run to it hoping it would find it difficult to chase you down there, and you were partially right; as you glance back you see it struggling to keep up with you, the new environment revealing to be a challenge, but it quickly starts closing in again: you turn around and let the flames spread on its face, momentarily blinding it. You quietly step away from it as it slowly regains the view, and you stand still. You were walking on thin ice, both literally and metaphorically: the thing sniffs the air, noticing nothing around, while you keep as still as possible, biting your teeth together as the cold is making you shiver again. It was almost done, when you hear a ‘crack’ and something gives in under your feet. The thing had already spotted you from the noise so you try to start running away before the ice can definitely break underneath yourself.  
You slip on the ice and the thing catches you while jumping, sliding on the ice as its clawed feet gripped the slippery surface. It sinks its claws in your coat and your scream as it scratches your belly and makes you drench your shirt with blood. Your hand reaches for the flamethrower, your last hope: you grip it and point it towards its face, trying to pull the trigger one last time. “FUCK YOU!” you yell as the thing literally eats fire and lets go of you, gripping at its throat as the flesh around its face darkens. You run away from the ice as it starts to crack widely and then sinks into the water, bringing the thing with it. You manage to escape to the land, but when you understand where you are you realize it’s the opposite river from the lodge and, in particular, from Josh’s unconscious body. You had a headstart since the thing had to get out of the freezing water – if it could still move after what you had done to it.  
You gulp as you start running around the lake: if the thing got out of the water, it would really be furious.

_You’d better get to Josh fast._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also I just remembered Chris and Mike had tied Josh with plastic straps. Duh, whatever.
> 
> EDIT: no, nope, I was wrong - I tried to read both Mike and Chris talking and Josh blabbing about plastic straps and mixed it up XD


	14. A hot descent in a cold hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Convenient ancient random oil lamps are too much convenient for me. Yes Until Dawn, I'm looking at you.

4:56 – two hours until dawn

You are running as fast as you can: the gas cans strapped to your shoulders kept clanking on the back of your legs at your every movement and your body had been pleading you to stop for the past five minutes, but you just couldn’t: if the wendigo reached Josh first, he was dead. And you couldn’t let it deprive you of the possibility of yelling how mad you were at him for all of this.

You had made your way back to the other side of the lake, but you were too late; not by much, still… the wendigo had beaten you: you could still see the prints of its claws getting back on the bank, so it couldn’t have been long since it left; you run back to the main path and look around: you recognize the trees and you see footprints around the place, but nobody is here. No Josh, no Jack. Not even Chris.  
You feel something shrink inside your chest as you think back at Jack’s lifeless head staring at you: another nightmare you would soon add to your collection, you were sure.  
You spot a trail of blood on the ground and silently curse: you follow it and it brings you back towards the shed, where you notice the first aid kit still laying on the bole; you take all you can from it and stuff it in your pockets, sure they will come handy when you’ll find Josh. Because you’re sure as hell you’ll find him, even if it’s the last thing you’ll ever do.

5:14

You had been following the snow trail up to another cave entrance: you would have been more careful if you weren’t in such a hurry and weren’t holding a flamethrower in your hands; you give the cave barely a glance before walking into it, following the path that led downwards quicker. You find old miners camps, railings and such. You don’t have time to stop but you always keep an eye out for wendigos, trying to keep your only way out clear as much as possible: if you were to meet one you didn’t want to be blocked while running back.  
Suddenly, while turning around the corner, you hear something like a whistle coming from your left. You stare at the darkness in horror before detecting a quick movement snapping towards you; you use the flamethrower just in time, and the wendigo falls back screeching.  
You run to your right as it is blocking the way you came from: you look behind while running to check on it when something plates you on the ground, claws digging in your flesh. You let out a startled yell as you see another wendigo on top of you, about to bite your flesh away; you scream again when something yanks the wendigo away from you and you immediately bathe in flames the two predators fighting in front of you.

You stand back on your feet and keep running down the cave, dodging and jumping from one bridge to the other; you enter in a wide part of the cave, faded moon light getting in from a crack on top of it; you feel something pushing you and you trip on the rocks: you get back on your feet but the wendigo tries to rip you apart with its claws, actually just managing to scratch the gas tank on your back; when you try to run he grips the can and pulls you towards itself, until you unstrap it and run away from it. The other wendigo reaches for it from behind and bites its neck, before pulling it back in the shadows. You try to run away but something claws your coat and pulls you back, yanking you in the middle of the cavern floor. You hear a hiss echoing in the back of the cavern and you remember about the gas container: you were almost sure the wendigo had scratched it. You look up to it before feeling something grabbing your leg: it’s no use sinking your nails into the ground as it spins you around and throws you against one of the walls; you land on your back and feel your breath being kicked out of your lungs. The wendigo pins you to the wall and screeches on your face one more time: you shut your eyes and hold your breath, panic taking over you.

_We’re not such an easy meal._

A little voice is able to whisper in the back of your mind, and you feel your hand moving on its own: you take the zippo and try to light it up. If you were going down, you were sure as hell taking it with you. You can’t light it right away though, and in the meanwhile it has already taken your head in between its hands, staring you down with his lifeless milky eyes. He then starts banging it on the rock wall behind until you feel your eyes roll back in your skull. Before it can finally bite your jugular away, the other wendigo comes back, hissing at its rival. The one gripping you widens its eyes before looking back and letting go of you, fighting with the other monster. You manage to crack your eyes open: everything is blurred and you can barely perceive movement in front of you.  
You stand on your feet and grab the back of your head as you feel it spinning, almost tripping on the floor. You clench your teeth as you desperately try to light the lighter: you feel your thumb burning for the rubbing before finally seeing a little flame dancing in front of your eyes. You turn around and throw it with all your force toward the gas containers, the explosion throwing you against a rock wall, knocking you definitely out.

5:41

You wake up to the stench of burning flesh, the flames bathing your skin in a warm light. You just crack one eye open as you hear something approaching you, the noise of its claws on the rocks making perfectly clear you were dealing with another wendigo. It sniffs around the place and ignores your immobile body for now, looking for the source of all that smell.  
When you’re sure its back is turned to you you hazard to take a little rock and throw it further into the cave, laying then as still as you were before. It immediately snaps up at the noise and looks around itself, following then the noise down the cave while you crawl inside another mine shaft, getting as far as possible from it all.

6:09

You had been walking for what looked like hours and you had realized the back of your head was bleeding, so you had wrapped a bandage around it, guessing leaving a trail of blood behind you wouldn’t have brought you much luck. You now jumped at every little noise you heard: you felt naked without having any weapon with you. You take a deep breath and walk down another mine shaft, hoping you were going somewhere with all of this.

The mines were cold and the wet air was slowly dampening your clothes, worsening the cold you were feeling, making you wrap your torso in your arms to try to keep warm. You turn the corner and find yourself in another campsite: you slowly look around yourself, making sure nothing is lurking in the shadows before moving again;  
You mentally revise your necessities: on top of all, finding Josh. But you needed also something to defend you with, else the wendigos would have eaten you on your way back. You stop walking as you see something shining at your right: walking closer, you recognize it to be an ancient pickaxe. ‘Not what I was hoping for, but it’ll have to do.’ You think as you turn it around in your hands.  
You keep exploring the place, finding even an old oil lamp (without any oil left of course, and no way to light it up anyway). You shake your head and realize the rusty pickaxe is your best bet, so you keep walking down the cave and out of the campsite;  
You hear something coming from around the corner and you hold your breath as you slowly lift the pickaxe, preparing to hit anything that was following you around. When it steps in front of you you swing your improvised weapon with all your force, and miss since your target ducks down: you are about to try again when a familiar voice stops you.  
“(y/n)! (y/n)! It’s me, Mike!” he says, standing up again. “Mike?!” you murmur, letting the pickaxe fall silently to the ground “Oh Mike!!!” you say clinging to his neck with your arms, tiptoeing and burying your face in his chest, feeling his arms keeping you close to him. His heart is thumping deeply inside his chest.  
“I thought you were dead.” He murmurs, then raises his head and gives you a kiss on the forehead “God, I thought you were dead.” You loosen your hug and cup his face, inspecting his new wounds “A-are you okay? You’re not dying or something??” he takes your hands in his and pulls them away from his face “I’m fine, don’t worry about me.” He gulps lightly “What happened to you? When Chris came back alone I thought those things had taken you for sure.” you lightly shake your head, trying to formulate a coherent sentence. “T-they…” you feel your eyes watering “They followed me for a while, but I managed to get rid of them. I-I came down here, looking for Josh.” You look up to him “I think something took him. Last time I saw him, he was passed out, and…” you just shake your head, unable to finish the sentence.

He takes your hands in his, making you look up at him. “(y/n), I… I don’t know how to tell you.” You widen your eyes, staring at his features, trying to understand what he means; “Joshua is dead.” You frown and take a step back: you had tried not to think about it for your entire trip in this hell, but you knew you would have probably needed to come to terms with this. “I’m sorry; I know this is hard for you.” You are heavy breathing, your fingers curling in your palms, trying to dispel the numbness that was taking over again.  
“Did you see his corpse?” you ask, staring at the wall, sure you’ll break out in tears if you looked at him “(y/n), I…” “Did you see his corpse, Mike?” you ask again, looking at him this time. He takes a deep breath. “One of those things was carrying him to its lair! There’s no way he’s still alive!” “But you didn’t see him die!” you insist. Mike frowns at you, trying to understand where you were going with this.  
He shakes his head while staring directly in your eyes: “No, forget it! I’m not letting you risk your life to go check on a corpse!” “He could still be alive, Mike! You don’t know for sure!!” he grabs you by your shoulders and raises the tone of his voice “We found Matt’s and Jessica’s bodies down there! And he was locked behind a door, shouting at the air! He’s far too deep in his own world, we could barely shake him out of it!!” you feel tears welling in your eyes and suppress a sob. That’s probably what Mike wanted to trigger, and he continues “I know you love him, I swear I do, and I understand you just want him to be back with you and everything to turn back the way it was, but there's no way to make it happen, (y/n)!” you feel tears running down your face as you stare back at him, holding your breath not to sob. ”He’s not the old Josh we know. He let his mind take over him. I-I barely recognize him by now, and I don’t think you should go back for him.” He cups your cheek with one of his hands, whispering softly “I don’t want you to go back for him.” He slowly leans down to kiss you but as soon as his lips touch yours you slap him away, tears still streaming down your cheeks. He cups his cheek and looks at you, while you just gaze at the ground and close your eyes.

You hear him pick up the pickaxe you had left on the ground and allow him to take you by your hand, letting him pull you away from that nightmare.


	15. Until dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter people!  
> Mainly inspired by Elliot choking himself in the last episode of Mr. Robot.

6:22 – One hour until dawn

Mike’s hand was warm compared to yours, but it wasn’t the cold the main reason you couldn't feel your fingers anymore;  
you kept following him, not sure whether it was the right thing to do or not. You feel like your life made little sense right now: you weren’t able to help your boyfriend, nor stop him or his hallucinations. You had threatened your friends, blindly enraged by things you could have actually avoided if you had payed more attention to them. You were pushing away the only person that could probably offer you love, without attaching any mental illness to it.  
You lick your lips, trying to think: some part of you had begun questioning if getting back to the surface was actually the right thing to do: you could have found some closure here, dying exactly where Josh had. You hated the idea of being hospitalized again, surely with a bunch of new PTSD symptoms at the very least. You didn’t want to go there without him. Josh hated anything that resembled a hospital with every fiber of his being as well, but he was always there for you, holding your hand whenever you had a crisis. He had always been there, shushing the voices away.  
You silently keep crying as you turn to that little part of yourself that unluckily knew always what to do.

_My my (y/n), you must be truly desperate to seek voluntarily solace in me._

“I don’t know what to do anymore. Everything is so upside down.” Mike turns his head towards you, but straightens it back when he realizes you weren’t talking to him. You feel him squeeze your hand, hoping it would help you stay with him.

_You’ve come to me because Josh is dead? Again?_

“I don’t know.” It chuckles back at you.

_Oh? Afraid little Mikey here is making fun of you?_

“He would never do that.” You murmur, widening your eyes.

_Because, what exactly? He’s not known for being so honest with his girlfriends, you know it right?_

You stare at Mike’s back “Yes. I know.”

_And what should make you so different? Because Josh’s life is at stake??_

“Well… yes.”

_Dear oh dear, what are our ears hearing!_

You keep silent for a moment, feeling more confused than before “What do I do?”

_You are the one in charge, (y/n). We won’t take control until your pills give in again. But maybe you should think about what you truly want: will you feel remorse for not looking for Josh? Are you willing to risk your life to make sure you did everything you could to save him?_

You ponder what it’s saying, barely realizing the fact that Mike was leading you through a narrow frame door.

_If your answers were both ‘yes’, I’d say we should close the door and lock it. Right. Now._

You quickly yank the pickaxe out of Mike’s hand and take a quick step back, locking the door with it. Mike turns around and grips the doorknob, trying to open it: the door doesn't give way and he grips the grid “(y/n)? What are you doing??” you look him in the eyes “Sorry Mike. I’m either coming back with Josh or I’m not coming back at all.” You sniff lightly, you felt you had just turned to ice by doing that to poor Mike. “Tell the others I’m sorry.” You turn around and make your way back to the caves, Mike’s pleads soon fading in the echo. 

6:38

You had managed to find your way back, mostly because of the voices’ help, who were gladly leading you towards what seemed certain death. You had found the campsite, and the corner where you had almost hit Mike. You brush your fingertips on the hole you had made on the wall before turning around the corner and going on in the cave.

Strangely, nothing seemed to lurk in the shadows: everything was quiet, but in a… normal way; you had stopped having the feeling of anything staring at the back of your head.  
Soon enough you hear voices, screams, echoing in the cave. You squeeze through a mauled grid door, careful not to scratch you on the already bloodied ends, and find yourself in front of a water basin: drops were echoing as they broke the still surface of the water.  
You didn’t know how to get on the other side though: you hated the idea of getting in the water, first because something might attack you in it, and second because you were going to get yourself drenched on purpose in the icy water of an already freezing cave.

But then you hear another plea coming from the other side of the cave and decide to ignore everything you were thinking and jump into the water.

6:46

_“Come back to us, Joshua.”_

“No. No no no, you’re not- you’re not real.”

_“You can’t escape from us. We’re your family.”_

Tattered arms were clinging to his chest, suffocating him and restraining his every movement, leaving him to crawl on the ground. He could barely feel the tears streaming down his cheeks. Man, did he fuck up. He hadn’t thought his own mind would have betrayed him in such a horrible way.

“G-get away from me.” He manages to whimper, but deep in his mind he knows it won’t happen.  
In his confused state, he thinks about you: it’s like a flash, lasting just a little moment, but that’s enough to find the courage to fight back everything around him; slowly everything fades back to normal, while he just takes his head between his hands, trying so hard not to sob.

 **“You’re still thinking about her?”** he lifts his gaze on the man standing in front of him, wearing a jumpsuit not unlike his, but drenched in blood. **“Tch. Pitiful.”** He manages to stand the gaze of the masked man, even if just barely. “What do _you_ know?” he scoffs at the man “How could you possibly understand? You’re just a monster.” **“A monster _you_ created, Washington. Don’t forget that part.”** Josh stands up and gets near him, face to face “You can’t tell me what to do anymore.”

The Psycho laughs at him **“And how will you fight me? No drugs, no more alcohol to keep me restrained.”** He suddenly puts an arm around Josh’s shoulders and pulls him closer to his side, lifting his other hand up towards the cave **“Just this cave and the two of us, my friend, for the rest of the eternity!”** Josh pushes him away, shaking frantically his head “You’re not real!” he growls, but the psycho punches him in the face hard enough to make him falter. Josh takes his face in between his hands, bending in half, feeling hot blood dripping on the pavement from his broken lip, between his fingers. **“I can speak, do and hurt as I please, Joshua.”** The Psycho says, bending down to his eye level and putting his hands on his knees while doing so.

Josh closes his eyes, defeat and anguish taking over him again. The Psycho barely pushes him down in a sitting position again, Josh looking at the ground.  
**“It was so easy taking over you, man.”** He chuckles while staring down at him. **“I just needed a couple of hallucinations to keep you busy while I threw away your meds, and boom! Own personal playtime.”** he glares back at his pitch black eyes: he had to have taken his pills. He didn’t know when, or how he managed to do that, but he knew it was him since the beginning. But how could he tell the others without blowing up his cover? He couldn’t have risked that.  
Josh pulls his knees closer to his chest and wraps his arms around his head, squeezing his eyes shut. If you were just here, he could- **“Haven’t you still realized she’s with Mike now?”** he shakes his head, trying to deny the obvious **“Oh, they’ll be kissing and fucking and flirting all the way back to their lives, forgetting about you completely. Letting you die alone in this cave.”** he singsongs. “N-N-No.” **“No?”** the Psycho straightens up and turns around to walk away from him, laughing **“Maybe you’re right. I’ve known her for quite some time.”** The Psycho disappears in the shadows **“Stubborn little thing, isn’t she?”**

“Don’t you _dare_ talking about her!!” he shouts back, but the Psycho just chuckles again, until his voice begins to twist and become less and less deep, resembling yours.  
He looks up and sees you stepping out of the shadows, covered in blood: your coat was ripped apart and your skin was covered in bruises and cuts, a wicked grin playing on your lips. “I didn’t think you could have fallen lower, Joshua.”

He kicks at the ground to push himself away from this, away from you. He lifts his hands in defense when he realizes his back hit the wall. “No... no please: anything but this…” he hears you chuckle again, as you step closer “Afraid of me, Josh?” he tries to shake his head, but he’s trembling “But I love you,” you cup your hands on your heart, as if hurt “and I’d never hurt someone I love, _right_?” your final words turn into a growl to his ears.  
“I’m sorry – you should have never seen this – any of this. I wanted to protect you.” You step in front of him and kneel to his eye level, looking at him with a serious face, something different in your voice “I know you tried.” He weeps again seeing your scratched and bloodied face. He tries to cup your cheek and surprisingly you let him. “I didn’t deserve you. I knew it from the first moment I met you.” He lowers his gaze and stands up, stepping away from you. “You would have always been better off with Mike. I-I knew it. But I couldn’t resist.” He clenches his fists at his sides, the bodies of his sisters flashing for a moment in front of him, to which he shuts his eyes “I just hope you haven’t died. Hope you’re safe. Even if it means you’re with him.” He sobs and doesn’t realize you had stepped behind him; “What are you even talking about?” you say softly as you wrap your arms around his torso “G-get away from me!” he tries to wiggle but he’s too weak and you are too determined not to let him go. “I told you: I’m not going anywhere without you, Josh.” He looks down at your hands, your fingers gently stroking his chest: no blood, no scratches. Just your skin against his “Y-you’re here…” he touches your hands, still not processing it.  
You were about to spit something sarcastic back at him, when he turns around and embraces you so tight you fear for the safety of your spine. “Oh my god… you’re here.”  
He loosens his grip around you, but doesn’t let you go “Why did you come back? You should be somewhere…safe.” You turn your head and speak softly into his ear. “I have already told you a thousand times, and I’ll keep telling you until you get it: I don’t care what happens. I’ll always be here for you, ‘till the end of the ride.” He lets go of you gradually, until he can look into your eyes. Then he leans in slowly, trying to understand if it’s okay for you, and he’s met halfway by your lips, softly kissing him back.

“Thank you for being here.”

6:58

You were both too tired to walk. Even though your stomachs were protesting, you decided it would have been better to take a break and rest for a little while.  
You sit next to each other, your head resting on his shoulder, his fingers lazily intertwined with yours as you look up at the night sky slowly fading away and making space to the beautiful colors brought by the dawn.  
You fell asleep in that peacefulness, finally forgetting about all your troubles, finally happy of being with the only person you cared about. Nothing was able to wake you up: not even the explosion of the lodge roaring in the distance.


End file.
